The Wrong Way
by Karaoke Risa
Summary: SquallxRinoa or Squinoa, however you like. AU OOC A twisted little love story laced with realism. Squall meets his friend's girlfriend, Rinoa, and damn it, he starts to like her, and worse-- she likes him, too. Bit of a Seiftis, as well.
1. Alcohol and Anecdotes

Reposted (technical difficulties).

A/N- I have returned after a long and trying period in my life... my father passed away last month and I'm still recovering, so writing is helping to keep me occupied. I thought I'd also give you fair warning that this is nothing like Time Apart was... It's a completely alternate universe, but I think some of you will like it anyway... Time Apart was a lame first attempt at this stuff. Oh, and it was brought to my attention that some of you may think Jax is a reference to a character in mortal combat, but I assure you they're unconnected. So, here's the beginning of The Wrong Way (affectionately named after the Sublime song Wrong Way... imagine that).

The Wrong Way

1. Alcohol and Anecdotes

The Wooden Nickel Bar was strangely unoccupied, and the only sounds were the blaring rock music from the juke box, the tinkering of ice in the glasses of the evening's few customers, and the soft thud as their drinks were being set back on their tables. There was little other noise, no chatter, which was unusual for Saturday night at a usually popular corner pub.

The brown haired bartender was disgustingly aware of the lack of business as he looked at his tip jar, frowning. On any given night of the week, it was usually brimming with bills, crumpled ones given liberally from the sloppily drunken college boys who frequented the bar, and neatly folded stacks of bills, mostly given by scantily clad women, smitten by the handsome young man serving their trendy cosmopolitans and hoping to be taken advantage of after business hours. Squall generally found these women repulsive, however, and most nights went home with no one or nothing more than a bottle of Pinot Noir or Jack Daniels, depending on his mood, and a pack of Camels.

Glancing at the clock, Squall groaned and made the announcement for last call, then began doing his closing side work, which usually consisted of cleaning and reorganizing the bar, and occasionally included swiping a shot of white tequila here and there.

He served the last few drinks for his remaining customers, then ushered them out the door as soon as their empty bottles and glasses hit the tables, locking up behind them. He then finished his work, put enough money in the register for the bottle of Jack Daniels he'd put in his coat pocket, then locked up the bar behind him as he began the walk to his apartment three blocks away.

Reaching his door, he shuffled inside, flipping a switch to illuminate the minimally furnished living room with the room's only lamp. He immediately jacked his cell phone in the charger, purely out of habit at this point rather than out of excessive use. Letting out a sigh of relief, he spread out onto his gray sofa while unscrewing the cap from his bottle of whiskey, then took a long and slow pull from it, fighting a grimace as the raucous liquid went down his throat.

He sat there for a long time, only moving to bring the bottle up to his lips then back down again, and stared at the bare wall in front of him. After about a half hour, he fished a cigarette from the pack that rested on the room's only table, a square cherry wood end table on the side of the sofa, and lit it up, his exceptionally pale blue eyes immediately returning to their previous position on the wall after completing the task. There wasn't anything particularly fascinating about that wall, but he didn't have the desire to do anything else with himself, and even if he did, there wasn't much else to do near four in the morning, let alone in his nearly empty two bedroom apartment.

Squall hated television, therefore he didn't own one. He had many books on various subjects, but he had read them all, most more than once. He had a stereo, and he loved music, but that only occupied him so much and he would end up just sitting back on the couch, doing the same thing, only with musical accompaniment.

It startled him sometimes, just how often he had nights like this. He worked in the bar every night except Sunday, and his few friends had day jobs, meaning he saw them maybe every couple of weeks if their schedules allowed it. Any other friends he had made over the past decade usually just drifted in and out of his life, appearing once every couple of years, then vanishing, only to repeat the process in the next two or three years.

Women in his life seemed to follow a similar pattern. He'd had several relationships in his twenty-six years, some more serious than others, but they tended to fade over time and usually ended civilly. Once in a while, old flames would re-emerge and it would be fun for a while, but it never lasted, always leaving Squall wondering if he had a problem with commitment, or if he truly was convinced that there was something better out there. Either way, actively seeking a lover had never been a priority, and maybe never would be.

But he couldn't deny the nagging feeling that tugged at his gut when he thought of being alone, as was happening now. Shuddering, he looked at the cigarette he'd been smoking, which was now down to the filter, and stubbed it out in the ceramic ashtray next to the pack. Screwing the cap back on the near empty bottle, he settled back into a comfortable position and closed his eyes, allowing sleep to relieve his tired body.

* * *

After about three hours, a high pitched ring filled the living room, sending Squall into a fit of tired swearing. Not bothering to open his eyes, his hand fumbled carelessly around the end table until he finally came across his cell phone and flipped it open, still jacked to the charger. 

"What?" he barked into the phone.

"Morning to you, too, sugar lips," a wry male voice responded.

"Jax?" Squall said, finally opening his eyes in surprise.

"Heh heh. How ya doing, Squall?"

"It's seven in the fucking morning, Jax, take a guess. Jesus, where the hell have you been? It's been like two years."

Jax chuckled, "We'll have time to catch up later, I just wanted to call and let you know to expect us around four."

"You're coming here? Today?" Squall choked, sitting up.

"You figured that out, did you? Boy, you've got skills."

"You said 'us'. Who's coming with you?"

"My girlfriend. You'll like her. See you today, four pm. I'll meet you at the Wooden Nickel."

"Wait- Jax? Jax are y-" Squall stopped himself at the sound of the phone clicking off. "Fuck."

He grumbled a bit, standing from the couch and stumbling to the bathroom.

Squall wasn't sure what to think at that moment. Jax McRae had been one of those friends-- ever flowing in and out of his life, often coming around when he needed money or a place to stay, usually both, then leaving at the first sign of trouble, which he usually caused. The people he brought around with him were rarely any different. Fortunately, Squall had learned Jax's tricks and stopped giving in to him nearly two years ago, and had every intention of turning him away again if he overstayed his welcome this time.

Not to say that Squall didn't like the guy. He often found Jax entertaining and they always had a good time together, at least until Jax did something stupid. He was a typical hot-head, always getting into fights over something dumb... gambling debts, drugs, sometimes just because he was drunk, flirting, even sometimes sleeping with women who had jealous boyfriends.

Grumbling again at the thought of the trouble he was certain was coming, Squall entered the shower wondering just what this visit was all about, and praying that he wouldn't be asked to bail anyone out of jail. _Not that I will_.

* * *

At 4:07, Squall entered the Wooden Nickel and found to no surprise that Jax hadn't arrived yet. He took an empty seat at the bar and decided he would give Jax twenty minutes before he left and resumed his normal Sunday errands. 

"Hey Squall," a slightly shrill voice said. "What are you doing here on your day off?"

Squall looked up to see Selphie, one of the part time bartenders, her big green eyes filled with genuine curiosity.

"Hey, Selph," he said. "Just meeting someone here."

"Oh. Well, can I get you anything while you're waiting?"

"Water would be good, thanks."

"What's this?" an amused voice said from behind him. "The Squall I know only drinks water when he's hung over. You hung over, Squally?"

"Couldn't you tell by the hostility on the phone this morning?" Squall replied, turning to face the tall figure of Jax.

"Oh, is that what that was?" he chuckled. "Man, I thought your were having sex, and I was enjoying thinking I interrupted." Grinning, he offered an outstretched hand to Squall, which he accepted and shook tightly.

"So, how are you?" Squall began. "What brings you back here?"

"Ah... well, we'll get to that, man, we'll get to that," Jax said, rubbing a hand over his thin black Vandyke. "First I want you to meet someone. This is Rinoa. Rinny, this is Squall."

Squall then saw the girl that was standing behind Jax as she stepped out and extended her hand to him.

"Hi," she said, offering a warm smile. "Jax has told me a lot about you. It's good to finally meet you."

"Yeah, nice to meet you, too," Squall replied, glancing over her.

She was medium height, had dark hair tied back with what looked like chopsticks, and large dark eyes, framed by black-rimmed, cat-eye framed glasses. Her body was thin, almost too thin, and she wore dark blue jeans and a white tank top.

He let himself stare a little longer than he should have, trying to gather a fair assessment. She was pretty... not terribly remarkable, not gorgeous, but she was attractive in a cute, quirky way.

"So, uh, what brings you both here?" Squall asked.

"Well... I've got something of a business opportunity going," Jax explained, taking a seat next to Squall, Rinoa taking a seat as well. "So, I'm moving back here."

"What kind of business?" Squall asked, not sure he really wanted to know. Business was never a good word when Jax spoke it.

"Ah, nothing too interesting, really. So what have you been up to these past two years? Still working here?"

"Six nights a week."

"No shit? So, how's tricks? Got a girlfriend?"

"No, not for a while now. How long have you two been together?"

"Almost a year," Jax stated proudly, his arm wrapping possessively around Rinoa's shoulders, to which she yielded no response. "This little wildcat and I are just crazy for each other, right, doll?"

Rinoa gave a scoff and something of an annoyed smirk, then waved to Selphie. "Can I get a Cape Cod, please?"

"Sure, darlin'," Selphie answered, grabbing a rocks glass and a bottle of cranberry juice simultaneously. "Can I get either of you boys something?"

"Rum and Coke," Jax said.

"Got it. Squall, more water?"

"How about a shot?" Squall said, shrugging.

"The usual?" Selphie asked as she poured vodka and cranberry juice into the rocks glass, knowing the answer. She served Rinoa her drink, quickly dispensed rum and Coke into another glass, then filled a shot glass with Patron Silver.

"What do we owe ya, cutie?" Jax asked as she placed their drinks in front of them, winking at the small brunette.

"On the house," Selphie said, as if it was obvious. "Any friend of Squall's is a friend of mine."

Squall swallowed down his shot and pulled a cigarette pack from his pocket, and offered one to his companions.

Jax shook his head, giving a disgusted look.

Rinoa smiled gratefully and accepted one. "Thanks."

"Babe, you know I don't like it when you smoke," Jax said sternly with a furrowed brow, glaring at her.

"And _you_ know I don't give a damn," she replied, not batting an eye as she glanced back at him.

Squall smirked and lit it for her. It was refreshing to see someone else not letting Jax have his way, and he silently congratulated her with a bigger smile, then lit one for himself, making sure to exhale smoke in Jax's direction.

"Aw, you guys suck," he groaned.

Rinoa chuckled and sent a wink at Squall, glad to see she had a teammate.

"So, where are you guys staying?" Squall asked before he could stop himself from opening that can of worms.

"Well, until we get an apartment or something, we'll be in that hotel, you know, the one across the street from that old shitty apartment you used to live in just down the street... man, that place was trashy." Jax said.

"Oh, you mean the Red Apple Hotel?"

"Yeah."

"I still live in that apartment, jack ass," Squall said in a low voice, feigning anger. "I oughta knock your teeth in."

Jax gave a conciliatory smile and squirmed. "Oh... well... it's not that bad... I mean, yours was nice-"

"Jax," Squall interrupted, chuckling. "It's okay, I was kidding. Man, it's so much fun seeing you put on the spot like that. It's just... so easy."

Rinoa let out a laugh.

Jax gave her a look, then glanced at Squall, seeing the knowing look that momentarily passed between the two of them, letting his irritation get the better of him.

"Jerk off. I'm going back to the fuckin' hotel," Jax grumbled, jerking out of his seat, obviously annoyed. "See you guys later."

He stormed out, throwing the door open and slamming it with a hard thud.

Squall watched him go, the amusement lingering on his smirking lips, then turned to Rinoa, who was equally amused by the display of sensitivity.

"He do this a lot?" Squall asked her.

"What? Get pissed off and leave me places or were you referring to his easily bruised ego?"

"I meant about him leaving you places."

"Sure, he does it all the time," she said nonchalantly.

"He does... hmmm... and you're okay with this?"

"I can handle myself just fine," she replied, pushing her glasses up with a finger. "If he wants to get upset at minuscule bullshit, that's his problem. I can always find a ride home. He'll be over it in the morning, anyway."

"Interesting," Squall muttered, taking a drag off of his cigarette. "And what if you don't know anyone nearby to give you ride home?"

"You think that's ever stopped me?"

"What... you hitch?"

"Sure."

"Isn't that dangerous?"

She gave him a look out of the corner of her eye. "Everything's dangerous these days. Red meat, smoking, salt, sugar, airplanes... heh... the air... microwaving Styrofoam..." she paused, then her expression became thoughtful. "Tell me this-- can you really avoid stepping on wet tile floors your whole life?" She smirked when he just blinked. "You've gotta pick your poisons."

Squall stared thoughtfully at her, a smile returning to his lips.

"You are not like any other girls he's brought around before."

She shrugged, turning to face him more fully. "Maybe that's why this is the longest relationship he's been in. Needed someone to give him a lot of shit and slap him around for once."

Squall laughed at that. She was certainly different than most girls he'd met in his whole life. Most women would fawn over someone dark and handsome like Jax and cater to his whim, but this was the first woman he'd seen near Jax that didn't. _And she's his fucking girlfriend_ he thought, amused.

"Not to say that I don't appreciate him. He's got good intentions and we have fun, but anyway... So, Squall, have you always lived here?" she asked, exhaling a thin stream of smoke.

"No... I traveled around a bit when I was younger, but settled here when I was about twenty-two."

"Oh? How old are you now?"

"Twenty-six."

"Four years. That's pretty impressive."

"Why's that?"

"Well, I've never lived anywhere longer than eighteen months. I suppose I just can't seem to find my place in life. Nothing really... fits. So far, anyway. I've tried so many things, some I know I shouldn't have, known many different kinds of people... I don't seem to be compatible with anyone or anything. Maybe I'm just stuck up or elitist... or maybe everyone else is, I don't know... But, anyway, I'm only twenty-four, so who knows where I'll end up."

Squall wasn't sure why he was so amazed at the openness in her self-deprecating admission. She hadn't divulged any top-secret information, but she was just so... unaffected and honest. He liked her more by the minute. He usually found it unnerving when conversations started turning personal and philosophical but he found himself telling her how much he related.

"... and I never really thought I'd be here so long," he was saying," but I guess maybe the loneliness and isolation got really... comfortable... after a while. I mean, sure I've had relationships and friends..."

And on it went. She would nod in understanding and tell her own stories, both marveling at their similarities and wondering if maybe everyone felt like this at some point.

"... So, I started dating Jax after he started coming into the casino I was working in every night, begging me for a date. I finally gave in, and I... got to like him after a while. He was certainly more promising than any of the others I had been dating, which is a whole other story. I think maybe it's comforting to be with someone who seems just as fucked up, if not more so, than yourself," she sighed, sipping at melting ice in the bottom of her glass.

"I know exactly what you mean," Squall said, lighting another cigarette for himself, then giving one to her. "My last relationship was just like that... two fucked up people just feeding off of each other, too distracted by the other's problems to have to think about their own. It just got too messy and ended... not terribly, but it wasn't exactly a pleasant experience. That was about four or five months ago now."

She nodded and smiled warmly. "I like you, Squall. I have to be honest... I was expecting another idiot low-life like all the other friends Jax has introduced me to. You're different, though. I can see why Jax is so intimidated by you."

Squall raised an eyebrow. "You think he's intimidated by me?"

"You don't?" she returned. "Well, he's been wanting to come back to town and start this business thing of his for about three months now and just barely got the courage to come and do it. All because of you and what you'll say to him."

"How do you figure?"

"He told me. He said he thinks of you as his big brother, ever watchful and ever superior. I wasn't sure what to expect."

Squall wasn't sure how to respond. Part of him wanted to retort how easy it was to be superior to an obsessive, drug abusing, gambling screw-up like Jax, but he hesitated. He was beginning to think that maybe Jax had things better than he did for once, at least in one aspect of his life.

He looked long and hard at Rinoa and smiled at her, feeling that tug of loneliness at the pit of his stomach.

"I really should go now," Rinoa sighed, standing. She took a five from the red purse she carried and dropped it into the tip jar. "Gotta go check on the little pubescent one. I've really enjoyed talking to you. I'm sure I'll be seeing more of you."

"Yeah," Squall mumbled. "I hope so. Tell Jax to give me a call later. Maybe we can all go out or something."

"Tonight?" she asked, her dark eyes lighting up. "Sure. If he doesn't wanna go, I'll ditch him for tonight and give you a call. Give me your number."

She winked at him and got a pen from her purse and snatched a napkin from the dispenser atop the bar, then pushed them his way. He quickly scrawled his cell number and gave it back, then walked her to the door.

"I guess I'll see you guys later," he said, opening the door for her.

"You bet," she agreed. "See ya."

She gave him one last smile then turned and began walking away, toward the direction of their hotel and Squall's apartment. Taking a heavy breath, Squall turned and walked back to his seat at the bar, a smile creeping up to his own lips as he thought about seeing her again tonight.

"Selphie?" he called.

"Yeah, darlin'?"

"Can you make me some coffee?"

* * *

A/N- Ah, there it is... the first chapter that kept evading me is finally written. I hope I still have a few fans out there to read my new story, even though the premise and universe are completely different. Speaking of which, I'm thinking of taking Time Apart down, because I did that one stupid thing- going back and reading it again to see how badly written it really was. If anyone wants me to keep it up, I will... I'll just have to think of it as an excusable first draft since it was my first stab at video game fanfiction. I'm trying hard to make this one better... more relationship dynamics, character development, and all that good stuff. This one may be a little more adult-oriented than T.A., so you have that to look forward to. Anyway, let me know what you think. 

DBH, if you're still out there, I could use one of your inspiring reviews:)

Oh, and someone asked me before what a Vandyke was, so I'll assume some of you may not know... It's like a goatee only a goatee is just chin hair... the Vandyke is the upper lip hair as well as chin hair (like a goatee and mustache together).


	2. Old Classics

2. Old Classics

Squall gave himself one last look in his bathroom mirror, trying to decide if he was dressed appropriately for the occasion. His trim body was adorned in black slacks and a dark rust-colored dress shirt, perhaps too prim and professional for a night club, but Squall was pleased with his overall appearance.

Satisfied that he couldn't get any more appropriate for the occasion even if he tried, given a limited wardrobe, he glanced at his watch. Jax had called a little over an hour before, having cooled off at the insistence of Rinoa that no harm was meant, and offered to take them out to a dance club for drinks, on him, to apologize for his irrational behavior.

Squall wasn't much of a dancer and normally would have declined, but Rinoa was going to be there and had pleaded that he come along, and he found himself agreeing without hesitation. He had even suggested a club that a friend of his managed, figuring he'd at least have someone to talk to if Jax and Rinoa spent most of the night dancing.

Clearing his throat, he grabbed his keys off of the small living room end table, then flipped off the light, locked the door, and descended the set of stairs that led up to his apartment. He walked around the back of the building to the small parking lot and to his poor, neglected old car, a rust-spotted '67 Falcon that he used maybe once every week or two. Truthfully, he loved his car, but he felt he didn't use it enough to justify spending a lot of money getting it properly fixed up, though all it really needed was a paint job and some re-upholstery.

Figuring that maybe he would get around to it one of these days, he turned over the ignition and put the car in first gear, then coasted across the street to pick up his friends, as was previously arranged. He parked the car out front and entered the seedy Red Apple Hotel to find Rinoa and Jax sitting at the far end of the large lobby, quietly.

"Hey, Squall," Rinoa greeted, perking up when she saw him. "You look nice. Jax, doesn't he look nice?"

"Yeah," Jax said, standing, obviously not paying much attention as he was busy straightening his tight black t-shirt and jeans.

"Thanks, Rinoa," Squall mumbled, slowly stepping across the room to them. "So do you."

And she certainly did. Her hair was tied up in the same fashion as before, and she still wore the glasses, but now she was dressed in a slim boat-neck black dress that ended just past her knees and black ankle-strap heels. When she stood and turned to pick up her purse, Squall could see little indistinct black shapes on the backs of her legs above her ankles, probably tattoos, but he was still too far away to tell what they were of.

"So, we ready?" Jax asked as Squall approached.

"Car's out front," he answered, turning around to lead them out.

They got in the car, Rinoa in the back and Jax in the passenger seat, and rode silently as Squall drove them to their destination, a downtown nightclub called The Spindle, which specialized in 80s new wave dance tunes and a variety of imported liquors.

Upon arrival, a large bouncer nodded once to Squall in recognition as they approached from the parking lot and held the door open for him and his party, the Smiths' "How Soon Is Now" assaulting their ears as they entered. Almost immediately, Rinoa dragged Jax to the large black-lit dance floor, mentioning something about her love for that song, and Squall went straight for the bar, scanning the crowded room for anyone he knew.

He found an empty seat and quickly spotted a tall familiar blond man looking back at him from behind the long, curving, gray marble counter.

"Hey, Squall!" the blond greeted him as he walked over. "What the hell are you doing here? You haven't been in here since... what was her name? Sharon?"

"Shannon," Squall corrected, extending his hand. "Yeah, it's been a while. Like what you've done with the place. How are you doing, Seifer?"

"I'm good, man, thanks," Seifer replied, shaking his friend's hand. "What brings you here?"

"Jax and his girlfriend," Squall said. "They just got into town and wanted to go out. I figured I'd bring them here so I could pester you all night."

Seifer grinned. "Want a drink?"

"Maybe just a beer," Squall sighed. "Gotta drive tonight. Where's Quistis?"

"Working late on a new account," Seifer answered, grabbing a Japanese lager from a little fridge under the bar and handing it over, popping the cap off with a bottle opener. "Apparently a completely unorganized company, so I suspect they recruited her for her anal-retentive organizational skills, and her accounting abilities are just a benefit. Anyhow, she'll probably be here a little later." Seifer paused for a moment. " So... what the fuck is Jax doing here?"

Squall noticed the trace of tension in Seifer's voice and shrugged. "I'm not entirely sure... he's being rather evasive on that subject and all I keep hearing about is some anonymous 'business' thing."

"Oh, shit," Seifer blurted out, his shoulers falling as he released a breath.

"Yeah," Squall nodded, looking down at his bottle. "I know."

The Smiths began to fade and were replaced by "Under the Milky Way" by The Church. Squall turned and searched the dancefloor, immediately spotting Rinoa nearby, still dancing with Jax, her back toward the bar.

Stars. The tattoos on the backs of her legs, one above each ankle, were thick outlines of stars, briefly illuminated by a wavering spotlight. Squall smirked.

Seifer followed Squall's eyes and spotted the very subject of their discussion, dancing with a small brunette.

"That his new girl?" Seifer asked, nearly shouting over the music.

"Yeah... only she's not really _new_. They've been together about a year."

"No shit?" Seifer sounded astonished. "Freak. Must be a masochist. She's cute, though."

"Yeah..." Squall muttered, turning back toward Seifer. He brought the beer bottle to his lips and swallowed down half the contents as Seifer walked away, momentarily distracted by one of his bartenders.

"Squall?" a feminine voice said as a long, lean figure took a seat to his right.

He turned to see a pretty blue-eyed blond in a beautifully tailored gray pantsuit smiling warmly at him.

"Quistis, hey!" he greeted upon recognition. He leaned over and gave her a tight hug. "How are you, gorgeous?"

Quistis released a disgusted breath, rolling her eyes. "Ugh... Busy. Tired. Miserable. You get the idea... But, how are you? Haven't seen you in a few weeks."

"I'm doing alright," he shrugged, as if implying satisfaction. "Bar's treating me well... and your husband's giving me free beer, so, you know... things are good."

Quistis chuckled, reaching back to pull her hair out of a tight bun. "Where is he, anyway?"

Squall took another swig and pointed in the direction of Seifer with his bottle, simultaneously retrieving his cigarettes from his breast pocket.

Quistis glanced over to where Squall had pointed at Seifer and smiled at him when he caught sight of her, getting a wink in return before she turned back to the brown haired man next to her.

"So what are you doing here tonight?" she asked, getting a thin cigarette from her purse.

Squall lit it for her, then lit his own, mumbling, "Here with Jax."

"Really?" Quistis' eyebrows raised. She'd always gotten along well with Jax ever since she'd met him three years before, through Squall. They were extremely different from each other, almost perfect opposites, but they'd made fast friends and remained close through the whole year that Jax lived in town before leaving in search of better opportunities.

Her dark blue eyes sought him out and she smiled when she saw him dancing, rather stiffly, with a dark-haired woman.

"Who's that?" she asked Squall, her eyes still on the couple.

"The girl? That would be his girlfriend."

"Wow... when did Jax get taste?" she jested, turning back to the bar.

Squall chuckled. "Yeah, she's pretty cool. You'll like her."

Seifer approached them again and leaned over the bar to kiss his wife quickly, before grabbing a wine glass from the hanging rack above him. He filled it with an imported Cabernet, then placed it in front of her, giving her another wink.

"That's the best greeting I've gotten all week," she said, smiling gratefully as she lifted the glass to her lips.

Squall finished off his beer and took a long pull on his cigarette. As he did, a slender, pale hand appeared in front of him and took the cigarette from his mouth.

He looked to his left to see Rinoa standing there, taking the cigarette she'd stolen into her smirking lips, her eyes on his as she took a drag. Her skin was mildly glowing with a thin layer of sweat, probably from dancing on the crowded floor.

"Having fun?" she asked as she exhaled smoke, then passed the cigarette back to him.

"Are you?" he countered, offering her a small smile.

"Yeah, I like this place," she said, taking a seat next to him.

Squall glanced around, not seeing her companion anywhere. "Where's Jax?"

"Oh, he said he saw someone he knew and ran off to talk to them," she said, shrugging. "Something about his new boss, I don't know."

Squall raised an eyebrow, but shrugged it off and turned to Quistis. "Quis, this is Rinoa, Jax' girlfriend."

"Hi!" Quistis exclaimed, reaching over Squall to shake Rinoa's hand. "I'm so glad to meet you!"

"Rinoa, this is my good friend Quistis," Squall explained, leaning back as Quistis thrust her hand in front of him, then nodded to Seifer. "And that's her husband, another good friend of mine, Seifer. He runs this place."

"Oh, it's good to meet you both," Rinoa said, eagerly returning Quistis' handshake, then Seifer's. "Awesome club you have here."

"I'm glad you like it," Seifer smiled, genuinely flattered. "Well, you just won yourself free drinks. What can I get you?"

"Wow, is that all it took?" she joked, "That was easier than I thought..."

"Well, really it's because you're Squall's friend," he admitted, chuckling, "but I appreciate it, anyway. So what would you like?"

"Um... do you have sake?" she ventured.

"You bet... any preference- oh, wait... I've got a good one for ya," he stated, winking at her. "Be right back."

Rinoa smiled graciously, then peered at Squall through her glasses, her dark eyes sparkling. "So... want to dance with me?"

He stared at her, utterly expressionless. After a moment, he shrugged. "What the hell. Quis, we'll be back."

"Okay," Quistis said absently, picking up her glass. "I'll watch your seats."

Squall got up as the song changed once again, this time to The English Beat's "Mirror in the Bathroom", and led Rinoa to the checkered dance floor.

They found their rhythm easily, both completely in tune with each other, even at an arm's length away, and even when she turned and danced with her back towards him. She moved with him gracefully, her eyes closing as the sensual tone of the strange song enveloped them.

Seifer returned with the sake, this time in front of the bar, and took Squall's seat next to Quistis, setting the tray he'd been holding down, and turned himself around in the stool to face the dance floor.

"Am I seeing this?" he gasped dramatically, turning to his wife, his voice becoming exaggeratedly nasal and incredulous. "Quistis! Quistis! Squall is _dancing_..."

"That's why I love you, honey," she sighed, a smirk on her glossy lips. "You're so bright."

"Damn right," Seifer chuckled, his green eyes returning to the couple. The song wasn't terribly fast-paced, but it wasn't slow, either, and they danced smoothly to the rhythm, much to Seifer's surprise. He wasn't sure Squall ever knew what dancing _was_ until now, but he complimented his partner well, dancing at a relative closeness, his eyes fixed on her.

"I'm going back to work," Seifer mumbled, shaking his head in bewilderment, then got up and walked back behind the bar.

A couple of minutes later, the song faded into "Lovesong" by The Cure and Squall and Rinoa returned to the bar, both laughing joyfully.

"Christ, I haven't danced in like four years," Squall laughed, settling back into his seat.

"I haven't had a decent dancing partner in like four years," she responded, still laughing as well as she sat back down. "So, that was a refreshing, and may I say, _pleasant_ surprise."

"Hey, guys," Jax' voice spoke suddenly from behind them, "I gotta split. Squall, can you take Rinny back to the hotel later?"

"Well, yeah... but, where are _you_ going?" Squall asked, puzzled by his early departure.

"I got some errands to run. Thanks, man. I owe ya."

"Hey, Jax," Quistis yelled over the music, giving him an expectant look.

"Oh, Quistis! Hey, cutie, I'm sorry," he said, giving her a quick hug. "I didn't see you there. I gotta go, though, but I promise I'll see you later."

She nodded, watching him slap a hundred dollar bill onto the bar, her brow creased with concern, then turned back to her drink.

"Hey, Jax-..." Squall cut himself short as he saw Jax was already too far away to hear over the loud music. He saw him walk out with a short, red-haired man that had apparently been waiting for him by the door, then shook his head and looked at Rinoa, who shrugged and picked up the sake in front of her.

He looked at the marble counter before him, his icy eyes settling on the hundred dollar bill, then spoke thoughtfully.

"Think we should have told him drinks were free tonight?"

* * *

"I like your car," Rinoa said suddenly from the passenger seat as they rode back to the hotel. "A sixty-seven, right? I could tell by the tail lights... among other things."

"Yeah," Squall said with amazement as he glanced over at her.

After three hours of dancing in the crowded club, her hair was starting to fall from where it was held back, a few dark strands framing her face, falling to her jaw, and her eye makeup had started to smear, creating a smoky and tired appearance around her half-open eyes.

Squall found her startlingly and unequivocally sexy at that moment. He suddenly wanted nothing more than to reach over and...

_No_. _Bad_.

He shook himself out of his reverie at the realization that his mind was entering dangerous territory and turned his eyes back to the road.

"So... you like cars..." he mumbled.

"I have kind of a thing for the classics, I guess," she said, her voice low and scratchy with exhaustion, giving her a sexy sound, much to the chagrin of Squall, who was trying hard to keep his thoughts clean. "They're just so much better than the pieces of shit they make these days."

Squall nodded in agreement, not really concerned if she saw the gesture or not. He saw the hotel up ahead and pulled up to the front, then turned off the engine and got out, intending to walk her to her room.

She got out and smiled when he came around to escort her inside, and began to dig through her purse for the room key. After a few seconds she came to an abrupt halt as they walked in the entrance.

"Shit," she breathed. "Jax has the room key."

"Is he here?" Squall asked.

Rinoa walked to the house phone on the right side of the lobby and picked it up. She dialed her three digit room number, waited, then cursed as she set the receiver back onto its cradle, telling Squall that Jax either still wasn't there, or was passed out cold.

"I guess... I can probably get another key..." she sighed, heading for the front desk.

Squall's eyes darted around the large lobby and spotted two obviously drunken men sitting on a worn couch, staring unabashedly at Rinoa, snickering to each other as they drank from a single flask.

"Uh, why don't you just come stay at my place?" The words spilled out before Squall knew what he was doing. He glanced at the drunkards once more, then nodded in self-assurance. "Yeah... look, Rinoa, if he's not upstairs, I don't think you should be here alone. This is hotel is a notorious recurring crime scene. We can leave Jax a message at the desk."

Rinoa gazed at him thoughtfully for a long moment, then shrugged and walked toward the front desk. "Okay, give me just a second, then."

He watched her as she walked away, his eyes involuntarily observing her slightly swaying hips, then falling on her tattoos, just under the calf muscles of her slender legs which flexed with every step in those four inch heels.

He groaned aloud.

"Oh, I'm fucked."

* * *

A/N- Alrighty! There she is... chapter two. Hope you enjoyed it! Please drop me a line, but be nice... I'm fragile.

D- (that's you, DBH)- Thanks for getting back to me! I'm so happy to know you're still around and reading my stuff! Anyway, yes, you've nailed what a lot of my intentions are with this story, and I hope you enjoy it, as different as it is from T.A., which I have decided to keep up, by the way, because you're right about the progression of the author thing. I sure hope I do better this time around.

KhaestaAradia- I'm so glad you enjoyed the beginning. It's always encouraging to hear stuff like that. Hope you liked this one, too, and I'll be updating as fast as I can, so keep watching! Thanks for your review!

shortie630- Thanks so much for the enthusiasm in your review! I'm really happy that you liked Time Apart... it's a little on the cheesy side, I know, but as long as you liked it, it's staying up. Like DBH pointed out to me recently, it's good for the readers, and the author, for everyone to see the development of an author's writing style. Anyway, thanks so much for your incredibly sweet review! I'll be working hard on this one! Keep reading!

DoubleMoon- Hey, doll! Great to hear from ya! I'm glad you liked the start, hopefully you'll like the rest. And, yes, I would be happy to review your story as soon as I get the chance to actually sit and read. You know I love your stuff... Thanks!

Love to all.

-Risa


	3. Jasmine Tea

3. Jasmine Tea

"I don't want you to worry 'bout nothin'," the stalky red-haired man spoke from behind the wheel of his navy Suburban. "Don't worry 'bout nothin', man, I'm gonna take care-a you. You gonna do good."

"I hope so, Richie," Jax sighed, looking out the window. "I've never really worked a legit job before, you know? At least not since I was like fifteen. That was something, man. I drove my old man's taxi around when he was off. I was fifteen, you know? Man, you see some fucked up shit when you drive a cab around. 'Specially in like New York or Chicago. That's where I was. Chicago."

"Yeah?" Richie asked. "You grow up there?"

"Not really. When I was a kid, my dad was in the army and we moved around a lot. Then he retired, divorced my mom, moved to Chicago, and became a cab driver."

As he spoke of his dad, memories flooded his mind, mostly unpleasant ones, and he became pensive as his eyes scoured the streets outside, no longer feeling like chatting.

Richie seemed to catch on to the sudden tension from Jax and he cleared his throat. "Anyway, the job is easy... I mean it's fuckin' data entry, no biggie. You'll catch on quick. The computer systems are easy to navigate your way around 'cause they're older than dirt. So, don't worry about any-a that shit. Just as long as you get to work on time, there won't be any problems. That's why I wanted to show you where the building is at... I'm not gonna be in town the next two days, so I wanted to show you before I left."

_'Yeah, only took three hours to get to after those stops at EVERY BAR along the way'_ Jax thought, sarcastically.

"Hey, is that your hotel?" Richie asked, nodding toward the Red Apple Hotel.

"Yeah," he mumbled, digging through his pocket for his hotel key as the car stopped. He stepped out and finally reached the key, a realization surfacing as his eyes settled on the small metal object.

_Shit,_ he thought, _Rinoa didn't have a key... _

"Uh... g'night, Richie," Jax mumbled, closing the car door, not waiting for a response. He went inside, heading straight for the front desk.

"Can I help you?" the middle-aged man behind the desk asked, lazily, his eyes on a small television set that sat off to the side.

"Yeah, I'm in room 202... uh, and I realized that my girlfriend didn't have a key... do you know if she got another key and if she's upstairs?"

The clerk finally looked up. "202? She left a message for you... Jax McRae, right?"

"Yeah."

The man handed him a folded slip of paper, then returned his attention to the television.

_Jax, _he read, _Didn't have a key, and Squall didn't want to leave me here alone, anyway. Going to stay at his apartment. Don't worry. You can call his phone if you want to reach me. I'll probably just be there until morning. XOXO. - R_

Jax tensed for a moment, instantly becoming suspicious, but then relaxed. Squall had always been a good guy, always trustworthy. _Probably would never even run a stop sign in his life, let alone mess with another man's girl_,he thought, shrugging off his discomfort.

"I gave her a key," the clerk volunteered. "She went upstairs, then I saw her leave with someone."

Jax nodded, mumbling his thanks, then headed for the elevator.

* * *

Rinoa sat on Squall's gray couch, smoking a cigarette and scrutinizing the nearly bare room. "You know, a painting or two might liven this place up a bit."

He glanced at her from where he stood in the kitchen, chuckling when he saw the playful smirk on her lips, then shrugged. "I guess I never really cared that much."

He emerged from the kitchen, handing her a cup of jasmine tea, then taking a seat next to her with his own cup in hand, making a conscious effort not to sit too close.

She blew out a puff of smoke and settled into the couch, her eyes involuntarily stealing another glance at him through her glasses, as she'd been doing all night, without regard to whether or not he noticed. She couldn't quite identify what it was about him that she found so attractive. Sure, he was good-looking, but that had little to do with it, and she knew it. She'd known good-looking people all throughout her life, Jax was very good-looking, but the effect of physical attraction had begun to wear off for her. She didn't care about appearances anymore... maybe never did.

She supposed it was that she felt comfortable with Squall. She'd known him less than a day, but she'd already found herself talking with him openly about her life, unconcerned of judgment, something she rarely did with anyone. It had taken a good month with Jax before she started opening up to him. And Squall seemed almost familiar, he related to her as though he'd been living her same life, but that was absurd. There was still much she had to learn about him, so much she didn't know, that he hadn't yet told her.

Yet. That word stuck in her mind, and she had a distinct feeling that she had only tapped the surface where Squall was concerned, but knew that it would all change. She would know him better before long, and she wasn't sure if that frightened or thrilled her.

"Can I say something rather... blunt?" Rinoa slurred out as she shook herself from her reverie.

"Jesus, you mean you haven't already?" he blurted out with a gentle laugh.

She gave a half-hearted smile, then spoke again. "I just have something I want to get off my chest... if that's okay."

He realized that something was troubling her as she was suddenly acting tentative, and he felt a twinge of guilt for making the stupid remark. "Sure. Are you all right?"

"Look, I know I've come off as bold and confident and outspoken, but... it's all bullshit. I mean, I tend to overcompensate for a severe inferiority complex, but that's not even the point. Just know that I wouldn't ordinarily say this kind of thing, but I feel really comfortable with you."

She paused to take a short puff from her cigarette, and Squall waited patiently for her to continue.

"I meant it when I told you that I like you..." she continued. "And that was before I'd even spoken to you all that much, not that I've spent that much time with you since, but regardless... I feel this inexplicable desire to get to know you better, and I haven't felt that since, well, I don't know when, but... fuck, I don't know. I don't know what I'm saying."

Squall was momentarily speechless. He wasn't exactly sure what she was saying either, but he knew that the feelings were mutual. But he also knew that wasn't the point. She was obviously battling with herself and he was afraid of saying anything that might make her clam up. He watched as she looked down at her lap, at the cup in her hands, the cigarette that rested casually between her fingers that had burned almost to the filter.

"I made a dumb joke earlier about this being the longest relationship Jax has been in," she began again, her words slow and deliberate. "Well, it's the longest one I've been in, too." She swallowed and cleared her throat. "I, uh... I have this problem. Not just one, really, but... I've... I've never been faithful to anyone I've been with. Until now. And I don't know if that's because I care _that much_ for Jax, or because I simply haven't encountered something better. I know that sounds terrible..."

She stopped again, maybe for good as far as this topic was concerned, but it didn't matter. He suddenly knew exactly what she was trying to say. She wasn't a bad person, and he knew that, despite her philandering ways, but she had problems. She'd been sticking to her convictions to make her relationship work, and now it was being challenged, and only after a day of knowing him. He'd sure as hell been there before, and knew that having a fragile will was one of the hardest things to know about oneself.

"Rinoa," Squall said, his voice raspy, "I know what you're saying. Honestly, I've been guilty of the same thing. But, there's nothing to worry about. I mean, we just met and we're friends now, right? No one said anything else has to happen. Come on... we're gonna just be good friends, all right? Not that we should even worry about it now, but whatever happens in the future happens. But we know where we stand now."

She let out a breath, seemingly relieved by his words, and smiled. "Yeah. I just wanted to get it out. Thanks..." She crushed her cigarette out in the ashtray, then turned back to him. "So, you're the... uh, same way, huh?"

"Yeah," Squall sighed, his head lowering. "I have been. So I understand what you're trying to do. Even if it has nothing to do with Jax, and this sounds like horrible advice, you've got to at least stick to it for yourself. Prove to yourself that your capable of it. It will help you, either in your current relationship or future ones. If it doesn't work... well, then maybe settling isn't for you. Who knows... I mean, we all change throughout our lives."

She smiled wider. "Thanks for that. I appreciate it. And I do care about Jax... but sometimes he's... well, whatever. Thanks again."

"Feel better now?" he asked, a smirk climbing to his own lips.

"Yeah. Now we can talk about something else."

He chuckled. "Okay... like what?"

"You. So you've worked in the same bar for a few years?"

"Yup."

"Do you like it there?"

He shrugged. "It's a job. Decent money."

"Yeah? How much do you make in a night?"

"Most nights, I'd say it averages out to about two-fifty or so, tips and wages."

Rinoa's eyebrows shot up. "A night?"

"More or less."

"What the hell are you doing in this place?" She made a circular gesture with her hand, implying the apartment.

Squall laughed. "What? My high-tower penthouse? Pft... like you wouldn't live here."

She chuckled, knowing she didn't have to explain that she meant no offense. "Well, _I_ would, but most people that make your kind of money wouldn't."

"I like it here all right. And it saves me money."

"Saving for anything in particular?"

"Oh, you know, house on the beach, a golf course or two... maybe a really expensive status-mobile, or I guess they're called SUVs these days, or maybe a Hummer... you know, something that guzzles tons of gas, but makes me look like I'm trying to look rich..."

She chuckled heartily. "Yuck. Maybe you could just fix up your Falcon... make it nice and pretty?"

He feigned horror. "You mean you don't like the rust? I thought it was highly fashionable."

She laughed. "Come on... what are you saving for?"

"I don't really know... just in case, I guess," he said with a shrug, shifting in his seat to a more comfortable position.

"Well, maybe you could go back to school? Get into something you enjoy if you've got the money to spare."

He nodded. "I went for quite a while."

"Yeah? What'd you study?"

"A few things, mostly abnormal psychology."

"Did you get a degree?" she asked, looking at him with genuine interest.

"Maybe four courses from a PhD."

Her jaw dropped. "You're kidding."

He shook his head, lighting a cigarette.

"Why'd you stop? You could be a doctor or a professor by now."

He shrugged. "Didn't wanna be."

She stared at him for nearly a minute. Then she burst into laughter. "You are fucking weird."

He chuckled. "Maybe... so, what about you? What are you interested in?"

"I don't know really," she said, her voice rough and tired suddenly. "That sounds like a cop out, but I seem to have lost my taste in everything I used to like. I was into music for a while... I played violin, but I got bored. Same thing with art. I just can't seem to stick to anything. Story of my life, I guess."

"What did you do in the casino?" he asked with a smirk.

She gave him a sideways glance, her eyes blinking slowly. "I wasn't a dancer or anything, if that's what you're thinking. I was a blackjack dealer."

"Really? So you could probably kick my ass at blackjack?"

"More than likely," she sighed, settling into the couch once again, her eyelids heavy. "But you never know... The house always has ways to screw you, but it's really just chance... only a little skill... involved."

He watched her for several moments as her eyes began to close, then she would force them open again, the process happening repeatedly. Finally she closed them and didn't open them again, her body becoming visibly relaxed. Squall continued to look at her, at the strands of dark brown hair that had fallen to her chin, to the thick lashes of her closed eyes under her glasses, the glasses that did nothing but add to her appeal, to her slim nose, somewhat bony and maybe European, to her slightly thin lips, down to her slender neck and her slim black-clad body, to her pale legs. He could see only two points of the star below her right calf, just inches above the straps of her high-heels.

He glanced back up to her face to ensure that she was asleep, stubbed out his cigarette, then he gently reached down and unbuckled the thin straps on her shoes and carefully slipped them off, observing the dark polish on her toenails. He then reached up and slid the sticks that held her hair together out, seeing for the first time that her hair was thick and fell just past her jaw at a subtle slant, shorter at the back and gradually getting longer towards the front, down to about the middle of her neck.

He broke his gaze and stood, then slid his arms under her and very gently carried her into the dark spare bedroom. He laid her on the soft bed and covered her with a thin blanket, as it was a little warm that night and she probably wouldn't need more, then removed her glasses and placed them on a small nightstand. He gazed for a moment longer then immediately snapped out of it and left the room, closing the door behind him.

He tiredly trudged to his own bedroom across the hall, already having doubts about their friendship. He knew from good experience how hard it was to maintain a friendship with someone he was undeniably attracted to. But then again, they barely knew each other, so maybe it would wear off and work itself out. At least it helped to keep thinking that way.

_But if Jax starts fucking around_, he thought with startling seriousness, _he doesn't stand a chance_.

* * *

Rinoa opened her eyes as Squall closed the bedroom door, immediately figuring that he'd carried her in there. She smiled, appreciative of his chivalry and consideration. The nicest Jax would have done is throw a blanket over her and leave her on the couch. _Don't do that, Rinoa. Don't start making comparisons._

Given her track record, she knew the odds were against her in this battle to do the right thing. And a battle it was. Squall and she had a frightening chemistry. She hadn't even needed to explain her point earlier and he nailed it for her. _When was the last time that happened?_

She hoped that it was a passing phase, nothing but irrational lust, but maybe something that would develop into nothing but a close friendship. Oh, God, but he liked her too... he didn't even need to tell her and that made it even worse. The promiscuity in her was screaming for her to go into his bedroom, and she was almost certain that he wouldn't turn her away. And it would be great, she was sure of it. But in the morning... she knew what would happen. Everything would be irreparably ruined.

Not that Jax was a complete angel. Among other stupid things he'd done, she had a strong suspicion that he'd slept with someone else since they'd been together, with an ex co-worker of hers. The only thing that really bothered her about it was that she didn't really care. When she'd told Squall she'd never been faithful to anyone she'd told the truth, but the fact was that no one had ever been faithful to her, either. Only once had she been the first one to cheat, but in most cases it was fueled by revenge and she hated it. She didn't want to do something for stupid reasons, especially reasons she didn't know to be true in this case. If Jax truly hadn't done anything, then she didn't want to be the villain. It may not be love, but she cared about Jax.

And she liked Squall too much to even consider using him for revenge. And God, how she already wanted him for other reasons. _Stop thinking about that_.

Groaning aloud, she snapped her eyes shut and sighed, just wanting to sleep.

* * *

A/N- I feel like I'm rushing this a bit much, but I'll be trying hard to keep things nice and thick with tension for a while. If anyone would care to make suggestions on what you would like to see happen, please do submit them. I have plenty of ideas for later chapters, but I have been known to use the suggestions of my reviewers, so don't be hesitant to give me yours for the next few. I'd love to read them.

D- Yeah, this story is loosely (emphasis on _loosely_) based on a lot of my own personal experiences and mostly just through a lot of little details and quirks (like Rinoa's tattoos, those are actually my own), but it is fairly common subject matter, so I imagine a lot of people, at least the more mature readers, will be able to relate to an aspect or two of the story. Anyway, I admit I do like seeing my review count go up, but I don't mind at all if you send them by email, as your reviews are my most valued. Anyway you can works for me. Thanks for the suggestions, by the way.

shortie630- Hope this gave you a little insight into what everyone's up to, but I have a few more things in store. I'm glad you liked the last chapter! I'm working hard on this one! (I've been editing each chapter at least five times before posting. Phew.) Thanks a bunch!

Rinoa Leonheartilly- Hey, I was wondering if you were still around. Good to hear from ya! Anyway, I just started posting within the last two weeks or so, so you aren't too far behind, no worries. I'm glad you like the plot so far, and I hope you like what's to come. Like I posted, it's a lot different from T.A., but I think this will turn out better. Who knows? Thanks for sending a review!


	4. Morning Coffee

A/N: This chapter is going to suck. It's really just filler so that I can get to the interesting part of the story... and because it really was discouraging to lose what I'd already written for this chapter. I kind of just want to get over this proverbial hump. Sorry guys.

4. Morning Coffee

The morning sun blared through the window in the spare bedroom as it rose, rousing the room's occupant from her slumber. Blinking groggily, Rinoa instinctively fumbled for her glasses, her hand smacking into the table next to the bed. Inwardly groaning, she felt around the surface until her fingers finally felt the familiar contours of her glasses. She slipped them on and glanced around, the memories of the night before quickly resurfacing in her mind. _Ah_, _Squall's apartment_.

She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and stood, not expecting the wave of dizziness that nearly knocked her back down. She took in a breath and regained her balance, not unfamiliar with the sensations of hangovers. Realizing that she probably looked like hell, she quickly ran her fingers through her hair after an unsuccessful search for the sticks she'd used to hold her hair up nearby, and crept toward the door, hoping that Squall was still sleeping.

She gently turned the knob and tugged the door open a crack, her eyes settling on the closed door directly across the hall. Her eyes darted around and spotted another door cracked open, the edge of a bathtub visible. _A-ha! Bathroom!_

She took one more glance around, and when she was certain the coast was clear, she made a beeline for the open door and quickly closed it behind her.

After a few moments, she emerged feeling slightly better after having found a comb and some mouthwash. She stepped into the hallway, her nose suddenly picking up on a scent that she hadn't noticed when she'd sprinted for the bathroom. _Coffee_.

She took a breath and proceeded, heading for the open area of the living room and kitchen. Rounding the corner, she saw Squall sitting on top of a counter in the small kitchen, wearing a tight-fitting white t-shirt and loose black cotton pants, sipping from a black mug, his eyes knowingly on her.

"Mm... Morning," Rinoa rasped, her voice irrecovered from sleep and the cigarettes from the night before.

"Morning," Squall greeted politely, then gestured toward the coffee maker on the counter opposite him. "Coffee?"

She thought for a moment, then shrugged, figuring it was still too early for Jax to be up. "Sure... thanks."

Squall lifted a finger from the mug he was sipping from and pointed to a cabinet. Rinoa picked up the hint and opened it, retrieving a gray mug from the lowest shelf. After pouring herself a cup, she turned and walked into the living room in search of her possessions.

Squall sat on the counter for a few moments longer, considering the interaction just moments prior. He'd seen her with her hair down when he'd pulled the sticks out the night before, but she'd been unconscious at the time. Now she was awake, her eyes large and dark, still a tad smudgy from her makeup, and her hair was loose and framing her face. All he could think at the moment was that his resolve to abstain from her was weaker than he'd thought.

Shaking his head, he slipped down from the counter and followed her into the living room and leaned against the wall, watching silently for a few moments as she rapidly put her hair back up with the chopsticks, then sat on the couch to strap her shoes back on.

"If I didn't say it before, Squall," she began, her eyes focused on her task, "I had a great time last night."

Squall smirked. "Good."

"And... uh... thanks for listening to my drunken rambling," she mumbled, her eyes sliding back up to his.

Squall absently raised an eyebrow. "Does that imply that you weren't being entirely truthful?"

Rinoa smiled warmly, lifting her coffee mug from the side table. "Not at all. I was being honest. I just may have been a tad more hesitant to be so open if it weren't from the alcohol. But really... I'm glad we could talk... about it."

Squall considered this for a moment, then smirked once more. "No problem."

Rinoa downed the rest of her coffee and got up, brushing past Squall on her way back to the kitchen, her unoccupied hand making light contact with his thigh. She wasn't sure if she subconsciously did it, but either way, she relished the tingle it gave her down her spine, and the quiet but quick intake of breath she heard from Squall's mouth.

She placed her cup in the sink, then came back to the living room, making an effort to not touch him this time. She grabbed her purse from the floor and stood, turning to face him.

His eyes were steady on her, having not moved from his position against the wall. Rinoa thought she saw a faint smile on his lips, but she couldn't be certain. A trace of smile passed her lips, as well, and she took a breath.

"I need to go," she said.

"Yeah," Squall mumbled, his eyes still on her.

Rinoa stepped forward, hesitantly at first, then she moved more boldly. As she approached him, she gave him a grin, then leaned up and kissed his cheek.

Squall froze for a moment, then mentally shook himself out of it, his lips returning the kiss on her pale cheek just before she pulled back. As she did, their eyes met and it took her several moments to pull herself away entirely. She looked away then continued for the door, knowing that if she'd lingered a moment later that the temptation would have been too much.

Squall watched as she opened the door and gave him an awkward smile as she exited, quietly closing the door behind her. His eyes lingered on the door several moments afterwards, thinking hard about what he knew nearly happened. He was losing it. Had she not turned away when she did, he was sure he would have kissed her.

_Another man's girl_, he chided himself.

Shaking his head, he pulled himself off the wall and went to the kitchen, turned off the coffee maker, then headed for the bathroom to shower. At least he had work to focus on today.

* * *

The Wooden Nickel began to pick up business around six o'clock and Squall was grateful for the distraction. He'd spent entirely too much of the day brooding on his lack of a love life, to Rinoa, to ultimately the events of that morning, and breathed a sigh of relief when a crowd began filling the bar. 

He'd just gotten through serving a party of seven that had arrived when Quistis entered.

"Hey," he said, surprise evident in his voice. "What are you doing here?"

Quistis smiled and sat in one of the few remaining empty seats at the bar, setting her black briefcase on the counter. "Wanted to come in and say hello. Haven't been here in a while."

Squall grabbed the briefcase and stowed it under the bar for her, then got a wine glass down from the rack that hung above the bar. He poured her a glass of her favorite Cabernet, a smirk on his lips.

"Sure you weren't hoping to find Jax?" he asked, pushing the glass towards her.

Quistis accepted the glass, a guilty smile creeping over her face. "Okay, I kinda did. I just didn't get a chance to talk to him last night and I was concerned with what he's up to."

Squall shrugged, having nothing to offer her in the way of information. "He'll probably stop in sooner or later."

"Well, I can't stay too long. I need to get home and get some work done. This new account is killing me, and I haven't even opened their financial records for the past five years. That's next week's fun."

Squall gave her a sympathetic grimace before turning to a couple that had stepped up to the bar. He got them their drinks, then returned to Quistis.

"So, Rinoa seems nice," she said, lighting a cigarette.

Squall's eyes narrowed as he glanced at her, his shoulders slumping slightly. Just when he'd stopped thinking about her.

"Yeah," he replied, sounding more abrasive than he'd intended.

"What... you don't like her?" Quistis asked, her eyebrows raised in surprise.

"No, no... she's all right, I suppose." He tried to make it sound natural and casual, but the knowing look that crossed Quistis' face told him that he failed.

"Oh?"

Squall clenched his teeth.

Quistis grinned. "All right, huh?"

Squall let out a sigh and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I like her. She's nice and she's cute. I'm a guy. But that's all it is."

Quistis was aware of the tension that had flared up and she decided to drop it for now, swallowing down the rest of her wine. "Well, kiddo, I should head out. If Jax comes in, tell him to give me call."

Squall retrieved her briefcase and handed it over to her as she stood. "I will. Have fun with your homework."

Quistis groaned and dropped a few bills on the bar, knowing she didn't have to, then winked at him and left.

Squall let out another sigh. The last thing he wanted was his attraction to Rinoa to be obvious, and it made him tense to think that he'd let on about it so easily to Quistis.

This was ridiculous. He'd only just met the girl. It was probably a passing phase, just strengthened by the near-kiss that morning, something that would wear off once he got to know her better.

And it didn't help that he _really_ enjoyed the thought of getting to know her better. He was sure that his loneliness of late was simply getting the better of him. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, he was glad to see that another large party had entered, providing him with more much-needed distraction.

* * *

A/N: Okay, so this chapter was a bit redundant. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry... like I said, I'm just trying to get past this point so that I can try to progress with this story. 

I know it's been forever since I updated, so I hope my faithful reviewers are still around. Thanks guys for the reviews on the last chapter. I will go back to personal responses next time. And feel free to submit suggestions of stuff you'd like to see, and I'll try to work it in if it blends with my basic story line.


	5. Red Flags

5. Red Flags

Quistis blinked several times, hoping to clear the blurry vision that had invaded her eyes as she looked at the screen of her laptop. When all the numbers on the screen remained jumbled and illegible, she briefly shook her head, blinking several more times. She glanced over at the digital clock on her mahogany desk, able to read the large red numbers, though they were not entirely clear, either. 2:38 a.m.

She released a tired sigh, and leaned back against her office chair, about to close her eyes when she heard a key in the lock of the front door of the small house she shared with her husband. She glanced over to the door as it opened and Seifer entered, his eyes immediately spotting his wife, reclining in her chair.

"Hey, babe," Seifer greeted her, shuffling over to her. He bent down and kissed the top of her head, sighing in concern. "You should be in bed."

Quistis chucked, raising her head to kiss his lips. "You say that every night."

"I mean it every night. You've been working too hard. You need sleep."

Quistis let out another sigh and rubbed her eyes under her glasses. "I'd like to get more, believe me. I just can't right now. These people have me on a ridiculous weekly deadline, and these records are a mess. If I don't do this, I'll never finish in time."

Seifer frowned as he leaned against her desk and looked at his wife, seeing the dark circles around her eyes as she tried hard to blink the sleepiness out of them. "If you don't sleep, honey, you're not going to be thinking straight and you'll make a mistake."

He quickly realized that he'd said the wrong thing when she shot him a hard glare.

"I won't make a mistake," she hissed, defensively.

Seifer let out a frustrated sigh and threw his hands up in defeat. "Okay, Quistis, sorry. Didn't mean to imply that you weren't utterly infallible. Jesus. I'm going to bed."

He pushed himself away from the desk and turned to walk away, his jaw twitching, but he was stopped before he made it too far by her hand grabbing his. He turned back toward her, not meeting her eyes. "Yes?"

Quistis stared at him for a long moment, not letting go of his hand. It hurt her that he wouldn't look at her, and she felt her throat constrict a little.

This happened a lot, more than she was willing to admit. Their schedules clashed enough as it was when she was working normal business hours, but she'd started working overtime nearly a year ago and hadn't stopped, and though she didn't want to admit it, it had started to take its toll on their relationship.

She couldn't quite explain what drove her to stick to it. She was sure she could figure it out if she spent enough time delving into her psyche, but maybe that was the very thing she was avoiding.

Taking in a shaky breath, Quistis spoke softly. "I'm... I'm sorry. I just need to do a few more things and I'll be done soon. I promise."

Seifer's eyes remained down, and he didn't move or speak for several moments while Quistis waited with baited breath, hoping to at least get the small signal of acceptance, as usually happened.

She received nothing of the sort this time as he removed his hand from hers and turned around once again, then headed off in the direction of the bedroom. Quistis swallowed hard as he disappeared around a corner and she heard the bedroom door close.

Glancing at her computer screen, she cleared her throat and concentrated on the task at hand. After a few moments, she spotted something that didn't make sense, just a tiny discrepancy in the numbers. Unless she'd made a mistake, which she was sure she hadn't, then there may have been a problem, something that was likely to be easily fixable if she reviewed the entire record once more.

Inwardly, she was glad for the distraction, and she straightened herself in her chair to focus on the job in front of her, wiping away a stray tear that somehow found its way to her cheek.

* * *

"I can't go to the bar with you tonight, Rinoa, I have to work late," Jax's voice said in her ear through the receiver. 

Rinoa groaned. "Again? That's the sixth time in almost two weeks. What the hell are you doing over there, Jax?"

"Rinny, I just have a lot of work to catch up on. Look, if I get out early enough, I'll meet you over there later, if you're still gonna to go."

"Yeah," she said, coldly, "later."

She hung up the phone, not waiting for a response. This was something else. Never before had Jax worked a legitimate job, but now he was working overtime every opportunity he got. She didn't want to jump to conclusions that he was cheating on her, but he was sure making it difficult.

She climbed off the hotel bed and went to her suitcase, deciding that she didn't need him to have a good time. She sloppily rummaged through her clothes, trying to figure out just what she was going to do tonight after all and what the hell she was going to wear. Getting frustrated, she put her hands on her hips and groaned.

They had been planning on stopping by the Wooden Nickel to see Squall, but she wasn't so sure that she wanted to go alone for a number of reasons, the first of which, she was willing to admit, that every time she'd been around him recently, the tension just got thicker between them.

They'd all hung out together a couple of times since the night she'd stayed at his place and instead of things blowing over like she'd thought they would, they found themselves discreetly flirting, even if only by throwing small mischievous smirks in each other's direction, or by not-so-unintentionally brushing against one another whenever they 'had' to walk past.

They hadn't quite gotten as close as they had the morning she left him at his apartment when she kissed his cheek, but it still hadn't made a difference. The sexual tension, at least, was elevating to dangerous levels, and luckily they'd been experienced enough at this to be able to hide it from everyone else, but she just wasn't sure how long it would last before someone, mainly Jax, caught on.

The second reason she was leery of going to the bar alone was that there was always a preconceived notion that if you went alone, you were looking to pick up or be picked up, and Rinoa most certainly wasn't up for dealing with drunks with bad pick-up lines. She visibly shuddered at the thought.

She began pawing through her suitcase again, when the phone rang. She threw herself back across the bed and swooped up the receiver. "Yeah?"

"Rinoa?" Squall's voice said over the line.

"Hey, Squall!" she said, cringing at sounding more excited than she'd liked.

"Hey, you guys still coming?" He nearly yelled it at her, obviously having difficulty hearing himself over the loud noise in the busy bar.

"Well, Jax won't be, that's for sure," she replied, raising her voice a little so he could clearly hear her. "He's working late again, so I'm not sure if I should go or not."

Squall heard the trepidation in that statement, though it hadn't been overt, but he ignored it anyway, and spoke again as he poured a drink for a waiting customer, the phone wedged between his shoulder and ear. "Aw, come on. I'll keep the slobbering drunks off ya, I swear."

Rinoa chuckled, both at the offer, and at the fact that he'd nailed one of her concerns, while deliberately avoiding the other. "Well, maybe I will..."

Squall smiled. "Besides, Selphie's on tonight, too, and we're having a lot of fun talking shit about the customers, and there are lot of good ones to laugh at right now... no, I don't mean you, sir..."

Rinoa laughed as she heard the last comment. "Uh oh. No tips for you, buddy."

Squall chuckled. "Come on. Get your ass over here. We need you on our team."

Rinoa released a breath. "Okay, okay, give me a few minutes."

She didn't wait for an answer and hung up the phone, then hopped out of the bed once more and began to look through her suitcase again. She deliberated a good ten minutes before choosing a pair of slim, black pinstripe slacks and a white button-up shirt. She was careful in the decision, purposefully dressing nice, but keeping it conservative enough that she couldn't be accused of trying to attract Squall's attention... er... anyone's attention.

She yanked her hair back into her standard chop-stick held bun of sorts, applied a little mascara and a dab of concealer here and there, slipped on a pair of low-heeled strappy sandals and headed out the door with her red purse in hand.

She approached the bar and took a deep breath, all the loud noise from inside contributing to her nervousness at going in there alone. After a moment, she pulled the door open and stepped into the smoke-filled room, her eyes doing a quick scan over the place. Nearly every table was occupied and there were only about three open seats along the bar itself.

She caught sight of Squall, who apparently hadn't noticed her yet, as his back was facing her behind the bar, while he mixed a drink. She strode toward the bar, snagging one of the empty seats, a few feet down from where Squall stood. She observed the room once more, sending a smile toward Selphie at catching her eye, then continued, taking in her surroundings.

She turned back toward Squall, who still hadn't seen her, and guiltily took the opportunity to study his frame, clad in a snug-fitting black t-shirt and a pair of dark jeans. She absently bit her lip as she watched the slight movement of his back muscles under the fabric as he worked, and up to his face, where she could see his profile, a slight smirk on his face at a comment that Selphie had made nearby, though Rinoa couldn't hear what it had been. Quickly, she realized what she was doing and released her lip, hoping that no one saw the obvious display of lust. _I'm such a whore_, she though amusedly, letting out a small chuckle.

Squall finished his task and turned around, setting the drink in front of a waiting customer, then caught sight of Rinoa, sitting a few seats away. He gave her a grin which she readily returned and sauntered over.

"Hey, come here often?" he drawled, leaning on the bar in front of her.

"Ugh, I thought you were gonna protect me from bad pick-up lines," she groaned, a smirk playing on her lips.

He chuckled. "No, I only said I would keep slobbering drunks off of you. Big difference."

"And here I thought it was a package-deal."

Squall straightened up a little, still smiling. "What can I get ya?"

"Anything."

Squall raised an eyebrow. The word had been said wistfully, and he felt his face heat up a little. Rinoa's eyes flickered a bit, realizing that she'd sounded exactly how she _hadn't_ wanted to.

"Um... I mean... whatever..." she fumbled.

Squall smirked and leaned back down against the bar, no more that a foot from her face. "How about I give you a screaming orgasm?"

Rinoa's breath caught in her throat and heat washed through her body, before realizing that he was offering her a drink. She coughed a little when she sucked in a quick breath, forcing herself to resume breathing.

"It's the house special tonight," Squall explained, coolly, inwardly kicking himself for so blatantly coming onto her, though he had to admit that he was pleased with her reaction. "Not that you have to pay, anyway."

Rinoa cleared her throat, and chuckled, shaking off the tension that had risen high enough to choke on. "Maybe next time... just give me a Cape Cod. With a lot of ice." It was damn hot in there.

Squall rose to his full height and got to work, his mind still reeling from his comment. _What the fuck am I doing?_

He knew he shouldn't have asked her to come alone. He was well aware of the tension that had grown immensely between them over the past week or two, and he was fully aware that they were getting a bit more bold about it each time they saw each other. But he just couldn't help it. He liked her company, and as bad as it was for both of them, he knew he secretly enjoyed the silent torture of their discreet flirting. Not that it was so damned discreet now. He made himself a promise that he wasn't going to go overboard like that again tonight.

He finished the drink and placed it in front of her, offering her nothing but a friendly smile as he did, then excused himself as he tended to other customers.

Rinoa took in another heavy breath, then gulped down her drink, her mind racing. She was starting to think things she shouldn't, but she couldn't seem to stop it, nor did she really want to. Well, she'd been thinking things she shouldn't for a while now, but it was getting easier to think them, and it made her will waver a bit. Her thoughts were turning to Jax, at the fact that he'd been working overtime a lot, seemingly out of nowhere, and the lack of trust was rearing its head, lingering there, chipping away her feelings of guilt over flirting with Squall.

This wasn't what she wanted. The damaged part of her wanted to believe that Jax was legitimately working, that for once someone was being faithful to her. But another other part of her, probably equally damaged, to be fair, _wanted_ it to be what she suspected. She was attracted to Squall, and she'd never been one to really deny herself of the pleasures in life that she craved. _This is so fucked up_, she thought, chuckling humorlessly.

"What?" Squall spoke, suddenly, hearing the small laugh as he approached her again.

Her eyes darted up to him, having been jerked from her reverie. "Nothing... just... nothing."

He raised an eyebrow. "Right."

She shrugged helplessly, trying to get away from her thoughts. "Hey, can I bum a smoke?"

Squall reached into his pocket and got his cigarettes, then placed the pack and his lighter in front of her, and leaned down to her again, his elbows resting on the bar.

She mumbled her thanks and pulled one from the pack, then lit it, taking a long pull in hopes of calming her nerves a little.

Squall could easily sense the discomfort that radiated off of her like a fluorescent light, and he felt terrible for placing it there. "Are you okay, Rin?"

She nearly swooned at the concern in his voice, the look of worry in his eyes, the sweet way he shortened her name like that, and she nearly lost it. If she didn't look away now, she was going to grab him and kiss him.

She didn't look away. Her face flushed a bit and she found herself leaning closer.

Squall instantly saw the change in her. Her lips had parted slightly, her face had gotten closer to his, and he could feel the heat from her, and smell the cranberry, the vodka, and the smoke on her breath. It was intoxicating. He began to lean in, completely aware of what was about to happen.

Before she made it to him, she stopped, closed her eyes, and asked, breathlessly, "Can you leave your post for a few minutes?"

Squall glanced over the bar once, then to Selphie, and seeing that it wasn't terribly busy at that moment, at least nothing that Selphie couldn't handle, he turned back. "Yeah."

"Good." She got up and walked in the direction of the hallway where the restrooms were located.

Squall knew without a doubt that she wanted him to follow.

And he did, grabbing his cigarettes along the way.

* * *

A/N: Phew! Hope you guys liked it! There's still more to come! 

Oh, and I hope you remembered your personal review replies, because from here on out, they're gone. Can't get in trouble, now!


	6. Drowning It Down

6. Drowning It Down

Rinoa was waiting at the door to the ladies' room after having checked its vacancy, when Squall came in the hallway. He stopped at the first door near the beginning of the hallway with a "private" placard on it, the business office, and gestured toward it with a nod of his head to Rinoa before opening it.

He stepped in and Rinoa followed into the dark office. He closed the door softly, taking a last glance outside to ensure that no one noticed and flipped a switch, the bright overhead light blaring on, illuminating the small colorless room. There was nothing but a nearly bare wooden desk in the middle, and a small dark gray safe in the corner, adorned with a silver mechanism in the middle.

Their gazes met and she advanced towards him as he leaned against the desk. They got close, very close, their lips mere inches apart, and their eyes still locked on one another through her glasses. She leaned in, knowing that Squall wouldn't make a move unless she did, and got close enough to touch his lips with her own, but barely making any contact...

And then she stopped.

_Jax doesn't deserve this._

The energy in the room was deflated as her conscience caught up with her.

Squall knew exactly what happened, too.

Rinoa backed away, her eyes still on his for several moments. She took a breath to speak, but nothing came out. She simply didn't know what to say, and her eyes dropped to the floor.

"It's okay, Rinoa," Squall said, softly. "I know. And I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "No, don't be sorry. I'm just glad that we caught ourselves in time."

Squall wasn't about to correct her that she was the one who caught herself. He'd known full well what was about to happen, and the consequences involved, and he wasn't about to stop it, but he also wasn't going to push her if she didn't want it.

He was sorry, though. Sorry for the whole situation. He wanted her and he couldn't have her. She was involved with someone else.

_Your friend, idiot_, his mind reminded him. He sighed heavily. He knew it was a mistake.

Rinoa raised her eyes and looked at him again. "Fuck... I hope this doesn't... I still want to be friends with you, Squall."

He thought for a several seconds and then he nodded, somberly. "Me too."

"Do you think we can-...?"

"Yeah," he interrupted. "We can forget about this. I'm... I'm sorry."

A small smile reached Rinoa's lips, relieved at his words. "Thank you."

He gave a little smile of his own and replied. "No problem. Look, maybe you should get out of here right now. I just... I just think we need to cool off a little."

Rinoa nodded, swallowing hard. "Yeah. Jax and I will see you later."

Squall cringed a little at the mention of his friend's name as she opened the door and left. He sat there for several minutes more, his mind trying to make sense of everything that he was feeling.

He was obviously sexually frustrated, but that was really the least of it. It was bothering him more and more that she was with him, more than it really should have. It bothered him that she had gained a conscious about being with him right at that moment. But then again, it also bothered him that he wanted her to cheat on Jax with him. He really didn't want to do that to Jax, even as shitty as the guy had been, historically. And he had been a real shit head. A druggie, a drunk, just an all around low-life... _Stop it, Squall_.

But he wanted her so badly, overwhelmingly so, and it went beyond a sexual relationship. He simply enjoyed her company, and they related and got along so well. And he respected her more, even if a little begrudgingly so, for stopping herself before she did something she'd regret. He really didn't want to be the one responsible for the deterioration of her relationship, and ultimately her self-confidence. Getting involved with her was wrong. Wasn't it?

"Fuck," Squall groaned aloud, running his hands down his face in sheer frustration. Hissing out a breath, he got the cigarettes he'd put back into his pocket and lit one up, pulling on it hard.

The worst part of it was that he had no intention of severing the friendship they'd begun, even though he knew that he should, because he knew that this was going to happen again. He was absolutely certain it would. And he knew that he, again, wouldn't stop it.

He stalked to the door, the half-smoked cigarette still smoldering between his fingers as he yanked it open and slammed it shut, thundering back to the bar, absently grumbling curses at Jax every step of the way.

He went straight for a bottle of Patron and poured himself a shot, carelessly spilling some of the clear tequila on the counter, and downed it, unconcerned if anyone saw him, then poured another and threw it back just as quickly.

"Squall?" Selphie's small voice said behind him, having watched him since he'd returned from what she assumed was the restroom. "Are you all right?"

"Yup," he replied simply, his cheerful tone contradicting his body language as he returned the bottle to the shelf rather aggressively. "I'm fine."

Selphie raised her eyebrows and gawked at him for a few more moments, then shrugged. "All right."

He wasn't worried about Selphie ratting him out to the owner. She'd had plenty a drinking binge on the job as well, usually as a result of when she and her boyfriend were arguing, which was fairly often. It worked out since her boyfriend also happened to be the owner, and Selphie had no qualms with taking advantage of the booze for herself and her co-worker, and a few of their friends, here and there.

Squall took a deep breath, took one last drag on his cigarette, then stubbed it out in a nearby ashtray and returned to work.

* * *

Jax check his watch before he slipped his key into the door of the hotel room he shared with Rinoa. 9:24 p.m. _Not too late. _

He opened the door and peered around, the dark room, figuring that Rinoa must be out at the bar. He began to step back out, intending to go meet with her, when he heard a creak on the bed. Suddenly, a light from the lamp on the nightstand flared, and he saw Rinoa on the bed, her arm settling back down beside her from the lamp.

"Jax," she said, tonelessly, blinking her eyes to adjust to the light as she looked over at him.

"Hey, Rinny," he said, stepping back in and closing the door. He looked her over, seeing that she was still fully clothed in a pair of pinstripe pants and a white shirt, her glasses and shoes still on. "What are you doing here in the dark?"

She produced a smile and shrugged. "Nothing, just enjoying the quiet."

He nodded, not entirely understanding, but shrugged it off. "So let's go, huh?"

"To- to the bar?" she stammered, fighting a wince as she did so.

"Yeah, to the bar," he said, incredulously, turning back and opening the door. "Come on."

"Uh... Jax..." she trailed, fumbling for something clever to say to get out of seeing Squall again so soon. It had only been about two or three hours since their 'incident', and she had no idea just what kind of disaster this could turn into. She sighed, deciding that she didn't want to make Jax suspicious, since her brain wasn't functioning well enough to think of something good, fast. "Okay."

She stood up and straightened herself out a little, silently hoping that Squall would be cooled off enough by now, and followed Jax out the door, her mind racing with every possible scenario that could ensue, and planning escape routes.

They walked down the street together, hand in hand, Jax blathering about his job, something about all their scrambled systems, and how he already had a ton of work ahead of him, but she wasn't really listening.

Her stomach was doing flip-flops all over the place, getting worse with each step they took towards the Wooden Nickel. By the time they arrived, she was fighting to maintain her composure and took a an unsteady breath, hoping that Jax wasn't noticing just how nervous she was. Luckily, she could still hear him yammering on about the job, and though she felt a twinge of guilt for not listening, she was relieved that he wasn't paying any attention to her behavior.

Jax opened the door and they stepped in, their eyes immediately settling on Squall, who was occupied with a customer. They walked to the bar and took a seat, Rinoa ending up in the very seat she'd taken earlier, much to her chagrin.

Squall saw two people approach the bar out of the corner of his eye, and he turned to look as he ended his conversation with the customer before him.

_Oh shit_, he thought, his eyes settling on Rinoa, whose gaze was directed right at him, and then on Jax, who gave him a smile and a nod as they made eye contact.

He was still reeling from the encounter they'd had earlier, and though he'd calmed down, mostly at the result of the alcohol he'd been ingesting here and there, he found himself unsettled once again. Knowing that the slightest act of discomfort may give them away, given Jax' generally suspicious nature, he put a smile on his face and strode over to them.

"Hey guys," he greeted cordially.

"Hey," Jax replied, shifting in his seat.

"Hi, Squall," Rinoa greeted back, just as smoothly as Squall.

"What's up? What can I get ya?" Squall said, his eyes shifting from her to Jax, pleased with her delivery.

Though in the back of her mind she knew it might not be a good idea, alcohol was sounding really good right then.

"Cape Cod," Rinoa said, adding in a low voice, "a lot of vodka."

Squall couldn't help but chuckle at the order, immediately remembering that she'd asked for a lot of ice in the same tone earlier. And he knew the reason for the extra ingredients for both times.

Rinoa felt a smile on her lips as well, pleased to see that Squall was loosened up a little, and at the fact that he'd picked up on the request.

Jax finally got comfortable in his seat, oblivious to the little exchange, and looked up. "Uh... get me a Chivas."

Squall nodded, then spoke again, unable to resist. "Screaming orgasms are on special tonight, just so you know..."

Rinoa desperately fought laughter, amused by the underlying joke between the two of them, and relieved that they'd gone back to the comfort they'd had before, complete with the subtle flirtation.

Jax was completely oblivious as he just shook his head and mumbled, "Yuck, no thanks."

Rinoa let her eyes wander over Squall momentarily as he prepared their drinks, but stopped herself as she realized she was heading down the exact same path she had earlier, and went in search of something more interesting to look at. _Yeah, right, Rinoa... something more interesting than Squall? Hmph._

* * *

A/N: Yeah, I know, ending the chapter rather abruptly, but hey, this chapter was driving me nuts... I needed to get it the hell outta my sight. :)

I got a lot of reviews (woohoo!), so I just wanted to say thanks!


	7. Head Trip

A/N: Don't kill me for the content in this. Consider that a warning.

7. Head Trip

Rinoa stared dismally at the television screen in the hotel room, as Jax lie sprawled on his stomach across the floor, Xbox controller clutched in his hands.

"Fuckin' Hunters," Jax grunted for the twelfth time at his game of Halo.

Rinoa sighed, sitting up from where she'd been lying on the bed. She was getting damned tired of this. She'd spent so much time in this hotel room since they'd arrived weeks before, that _cabin fever_ was an excruciating understatement. If she'd known anything about what was in this town, and more people to hang out with, it wouldn't have been so bad.

There was always the Wooden Nickel, but she could only handle so much torture, and that's undeniably what it was becoming. Torture. Every time she'd seen Squall in the last week, since their near-romp in the business office, her mind would immediately careen toward the image of his lips barely touching hers... it was frustrating, to say the least. She couldn't _stop_ thinking about it, really, even when he wasn't around.

She had nowhere to go to get her mind off of it, and the more time she spent in this tiny room, the more she dwelt on it. She just couldn't let it get the better of her. She wouldn't.

"Jax, are we ever going to move into an actual... place?" she asked, warily.

"We _are_ in a place, Rinny," he replied, his eyes still on the screen. "We're getting a monthly rate, after all. It's just like an apartment. It's homey."

"Yeah. A whole two hundred square feet of orange shag carpet and no kitchen. It's a dream."

Jax just rolled his eyes and continued playing his game.

Rinoa gritted her teeth, and stood. "Well, I'm gonna take a shower." It was better than doing nothing.

When she didn't receive a reply of any kind, she shuffled her bare feet across the floor and into the bathroom, closing the door. She turned the water on in the shower, taking a deep breath, and turned to the mirror.

Her eyes settled on her reflection, and she began to pull the sticks from her hair, letting it fall around her face. She looked down and placed them on the counter before her, and removed her glasses, as well. When she looked up again, she blinked at the softly blurred image before her.

Squall was there, standing behind her, that knowing smirk on his lips. He stepped close to her, his hand reaching up slowly, to touch her shoulders. She closed her eyes, sucking in a breath, anticipating the contact. When none came, she opened her eyes again and, to her disappointment, found that he wasn't there.

She imitated his smirk to herself in the mirror, and reached for the hem of her shirt, then pulled it over her head. Keeping her gaze on her own eyes, she slipped her gray skirt down over her hips, letting it fall to the floor.

She reached behind her, to unclasp her bra, but then hesitated. It was silly. She knew it was, but she couldn't help it, didn't want to. She closed her eyes, indulging herself, imagining the touch was his. His fingers unhooking the garment, pulling the straps gently down her shoulders, then off of her completely, dropping it to the floor. His fingers grazing her hips, hooking into the sides of her panties, sliding them down her legs and then off to join the rest of her discarded clothing.

When she finally opened her eyes, she saw the mirror was becoming steamy from the shower and she stepped into the basin, letting the hot water envelope her. She got her hair thoroughly wet, then began to shampoo it, closing her eyes again, to avoid getting the soap in them.

Her thoughts immediately returned to him, and she once again allowed herself to imagine him there with her, his hands on her, gently washing her hair. When she opened her eyes again, he was there, in front of her, close to her, his brown hair wet, strands clinging to his face.

She looked up at him, into his ice blue eyes, which in turn were intently focused on hers. He was inching closer, his lips millimeters from hers, and she could feel him, the heat of his body in front of hers, his breath against her face.

He lips finally reached her, kissing her gently, then boldly as his tongue entered her mouth, his body moving in against her, pinning her against the cold blue tile. She could feel him, all of him, letting her feel how badly he wanted her, and she drank it in, letting her hands glide up his back and then back down again, clutching his slick body against hers.

His face dipped to her neck, his lips and tongue kissing and suckling at her, his hands sliding up her sides, massaging and groping her. Her breath became ragged her head lulled back against the tile. He raised his head and looked at her expectantly, and she knew what he wanted. "Yes..."

He grasped her hips and lifted her, her legs instinctively wrapping around him, and she immediately felt him sliding into her, planting himself deeply, her back pressed hard against the shower wall. A desperate moan involuntarily escaped her, and she hoped that Jax hadn't heard it from outside the bathroom.

_Jax_.

Her eyes flew open and she was alone, her body trembling, heat pooled in her groin. _Oh fuck..._

She wondered if she had really moaned aloud and giggled at the thought, then quickly resumed rinsing shampoo from her hair. Minutes later, she finished her shower and stepped out, wrapping a thin white towel around her body. She glanced around the bathroom and realized that she hadn't brought a change of clothes in with her. It wasn't such a big deal, but frankly, she wasn't sure she was ready to walk out and see Jax so soon after her little experience in the shower. _Oh well_.

She wiped some of the fog from the mirror, seeing her flushed appearance and she found herself smirking once more. She combed her hair slowly, giving herself time to cool off, and briefly dried it with the hair dryer the hotel provided on the wall, just enough to keep it from dripping everywhere. She slipped her glasses back on, and ensuring the towel was tightly secured around her, she opened the bathroom door, seeing Jax still playing his game.

His dark eyes darted up to her and a grin appeared on his lips. "Well, hey there."

Rinoa gave him a weak smile, and hurried to the small closet, opening the door, and ever so slightly hiding behind it as she grabbed a pair of jeans from a hanger along with a small black tee shirt.

"I like the towel, myself," Jax spoke into her ear, evidently having crept up behind her. His hands slid around her, one of them snaking its way inside the towel, and her body stiffened.

Jax didn't seem to notice her trepidation and continued his way in, placing his mouth at the base of her neck, kissing the sensitive skin.

Rinoa shivered at the contact in spite of herself, her eyes fluttering closed, her thoughts instantly returning to Squall. She released a long breath, feeling the heat return between her legs, and she found herself pressing back against him.

He purred against her, both of his hands invading the towel now, stroking her body, groping her, coming up to release the towel's knot and letting it fall to the floor. She moaned as he gently kneaded her breasts, then moved lower, two of his fingers inching their way down to touch her slick center. His fingers moved against the engorged skin in slow, tantalizing circles, and her head fell back to lean on his shoulder.

His mouth continued his exploration of her neck, his fingers increasing in pace, drawing another moan from her. He pressed his groin against her, and then stopped his ministrations, opting instead to turn her around.

She felt herself being turned, her mouth immediately being assaulted with his before she even could register what was happening. She submitted to his invasion of her mouth, her thoughts on the way he'd kissed her in the shower, on the slow and gentle way he'd treated her. This time was not slow and gentle, however, and Rinoa found herself wondering why it felt so different, so rough. _Squall doesn't have facial hair._

Her eyes cracked open and she quickly returned to reality. She was kissing Jax, naked, half way inside the small closet, her clothes still in hand. Her eyes widened and her body immediately tensed.

Jax either didn't notice, or didn't care, pulling her hard against him as he kissed her forcefully. This was the way he normally did things, so Rinoa couldn't figure out why this suddenly felt so odd. _Because you were imagining someone else, Rinoa_.

She fought a grimace, suddenly feeling very awkward and exposed, and she jerked away from him with more disdain than she'd hoped to display. She quickly grasped the towel from the floor and wrapped it around herself.

Jax stared at her, incredulous. "What... the fuck?"

"I... I'm getting a headache," she mumbled, her eyes avoiding his, "I'm sorry."

He stepped closer, his face inches from hers, "No, no... you were all into it a minute ago."

"And I started getting a headache," she insisted. She felt awful lying to him, but hell, wasn't she sort of lying already?

He was silent for a long moment, then his expression became dark.

"Are you fuckin' around?" he snarled.

She backed up, trying to give herself room to breathe, not entirely surprised to hear that question. Well, at least she technically wouldn't be lying now. "No, Jax."

"You sure?" he pressed, his brow furrowed, angrily.

Rinoa's temper began to creep up and now she was stepping closer. Sure, she'd come close, but she still hadn't, and all because she hadn't wanted to be unfaithful to him. "Yes, I'm sure, and fuck you for even asking."

So it was a little much. She was getting pissed, though, and after all the effort she'd made to do the right thing, it got to her that he'd so easily doubt her. Her mind and body were wracked with all kinds of mixed feelings at this point, and being rational just didn't look like an option.

"I'm not the one acting all shifty," he threw back. The two of them hadn't been intimate in weeks, and by God, he wasn't going to let it go so easy.

Rinoa stood agape for a moment. _She_ was acting shifty? He'd been the one progressively working more and more into ungodly hours of the night, after all, so damned if he was going to give _her_ shit.

"I'm not acting shifty, I have a headache, God damn it," she growled. "And I'm not the one who's been working nearly sixty hours a week out of the blue. _You_ tell _me_ what the hell is going on!"

Jax's mouth twitched angrily, and he opened it to speak, then snapped it shut again.

"What, Jax?" she persisted, tauntingly. "Been busy at the office?"

"I don't have to explain myself to you," he hissed. He backed away from her face, grabbed his black bomber jacket from the closet behind her and his office badge from the small entry counter, and stormed to the door.

"Right, go back to 'work'," Rinoa spat venomously.

Not even offering a moment's hesitation, he swung the door open and slammed it shut behind him, his hard footsteps thundering down the hall.

Rinoa stared at the door for several moments, trying to steel her body from shaking. _No, no, not now_.

She breathed deeply, then broke her gaze from the door, taking in the room. The TV was still on, and calmly she walked over and shut it off, then the Xbox, then dropped the clothes that she still held onto the bed and got dressed.

When that was done, she stepped into the bathroom, scooped up the clothes she'd left on the floor and threw them into the large trash bag they'd been using as a hamper. She meticulously swept the comb through her hair once more, brushed her teeth, applied antiperspirant, a little mascara, and picked up her chopsticks.

She brought them up to her hair, intending to sweep it up into her standard knot, but stopped. She rarely wore her hair down anymore, and now seemed as good a time as any for a little change.

Blankly, she gave herself a last glance, walked into the bedroom, shoved her feet into her favorite black sneakers, grabbed her purse and walked out the door.

When she arrived on the first floor, she poked her head out from inside the elevator before she stepped out, wanting to be sure that Jax wasn't just sulking in the lobby. The room was empty with the exception of the desk clerk, and she straightened up and headed for the front door.

As she exited the building and looked across the street at Squall's apartment building, she felt the nerves she'd been trying to suppress well up, and her body threatened to tremble again. She took a calming breath, checked the street for oncoming Sunday traffic, and when it was clear, she crossed the street. When she approached the building, she walked around the corner and scanned the parking lot until her eyes settled on the rusted Falcon.

Satisfied, she turned back around, and very slowly began to ascend the staircase that led to Squall's apartment. With every step, she struggled harder and harder to contain the nervousness that had been threatening to overcome her, and by the time she reached his door, she was shaking like a leaf.

With her trembling hand, she quickly rapped on the door three times, swearing her throat was going to constrict and choke her if he didn't answer soon.

It was too much. Her mind was a mess, and she knew that she'd break out into a sweat at any moment, and maybe her body would crumple up, and she'd be curled in the corner before long. She would hyperventilate, maybe was already doing it, she wasn't sure. She was going to die, she knew it. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, and she swore it would explode if it kept up that pace.

Finally, hope came when the door opened.

"Hey, Rin--... Rinoa, are you all right?" Squall asked, concern all over his face at the sight of her panicked expression.

"Squall," she breathed, in her equally overwhelming relief.

* * *

A/N: Yeah... weird, huh? So, it was mildly smutty... meh... you can handle it. There's more story to come... soon. Love ya!

BTW... I went back and edited all of the previous chapters. There are only slight changes here and there, most of you probably won't notice, but I thought I'd tell you anyway.


	8. Red Light Therapy

A/N: Heh heh. Enjoy!

8. Red Light Therapy

Without another word, Squall pulled her into the apartment, and closed the door behind her.

"What's going on?" he asked, moving to stand before her, clad in a snug white tee shirt and loose black pants. He didn't wait for an answer before gently pushing her over to the couch and sitting her down.

"I... I had a dr-..." Rinoa paused. Perhaps telling him of her daydream wouldn't be a good idea. "I had a fight with Jax."

Squall's brow furrowed and he headed into the kitchen, raising his voice so she could still hear him. "About what?"

Rinoa hesitated and took a few deep breaths, listening as she heard glasses tinkering around from inside the kitchen, then mumbled, "It was stupid."

Squall had to strain to hear the quiet reply, and he remained silent, filling two glasses with ice, a little club soda, and a lot of vodka, then returning to the living room. He sat on the couch beside her and handed her one of the glasses.

"Sure doesn't seem stupid, judging by your terrified appearance," he commented.

She took a large gulp from the glass, nearly choking on the unexpected volume of alcohol within.

"Christ, I thought this was water," she sputtered, examining the glass and then spotting the tiny bubbles.

Squall shrugged, swallowing down a fair portion of his drink. "I figured it would calm your nerves."

Rinoa gave the glass a thoughtful look. After the experience she just had, she knew drinking was likely a terrible idea. She was flustered, to say the least. Pissed off, sexually frustrated, and suffering an anxiety attack, to boot. The more she thought about it, though, the better the idea of drinking became. Giving a shrug of her own, she tipped back the glass and downed the remaining contents.

Squall gave a chuckle and glanced around for his cigarettes. He spotted them on the end table next to her, and realized that he'd have to reach over her to get them. Unless he asked her to hand them to him, of course. _What fun would that be?_

Before he could talk himself out of it, he leaned over her and grabbed the pack, his face close to hers, purposefully. Her eyelids fluttered and her face flushed, and Squall smiled apologetically as he slowly returned to his position.

Rinoa sucked in a shaky breath, then yanked the pack from his hands, and ripped out two cigarettes. She passed one to him, carelessly, and placed one to her lips. Realizing she had no lighter, she jerked around in search of one, before Squall pulled one from his pocket and ignited it inches from her face. She stilled and accepted the light, exhaling the first drag with obvious relief.

Squall watched as the stream of smoke wafted out from her parted lips, and a wave of heat washed through him, and he found himself fighting off arousal. Clearing his throat, he shifted on the couch, lit his own cigarette, and looked at his glass. "So... are you going to tell me what happened?"

"I think he's cheating on me," Rinoa blurted out. _Oh, shit. Why did I say that?_

"Really."

It wasn't a question. She could here the disdain in his tone clearly.

"I asked him about why he was spending so much time at work." Okay, so she shouted it. "He just got mad and... left. Back to the 'office', I suppose."

Squall's jaw twitched, and he realized he was grinding his teeth. "That fucker."

Rinoa's shoulders slumped. "Look, I'm sorry. The last thing I want to do is cause a rift in your friendship. It's not... it's not a big deal."

Squall was appalled. "If he's fuckin' around, Rinoa, it is a big deal. And, for the record, it's no shock, either."

Rinoa sighed and leaned back into the couch, swirling her glass of melting ice around in her lap, the smoldering cigarette between her fingers.

Squall couldn't help but let his eyes linger on her. Her hair was down, a few strands draping over her face. His gaze drifted down her slender neck, to her pale arms, to the glass that she held between her jean-clad legs...

Clearing his throat again, he grabbed her glass and stood, then hurried back to the kitchen.

Rinoa's eyes watched as he went, and when he disappeared behind the kitchen wall, she heard the unmistakable sound of liquid being poured. She stared at the wall opposite her. _Why did I come here?_

_You know exactly why you came here, Rinoa._ It was true. She was letting herself get past the point of caring for the consequences, and once that happened, there would be no one else to talk her out of it. She was the only thing stopping herself. She was in this, and she was getting damned tired of denying herself of what she wanted. Maybe she was just damned tired of thinking all the time.

She felt a weary smirk creep onto her face and she blinked a few times, realizing that she was staring at a stereo against the far wall. Tapping the excess ash of her half-burnt cigarette into the ashtray, she stood and sauntered over to the stereo that rested on the floor, and sat in front of it, immediately seizing the pile of CD cases that was beside it. She shoved the butt of the cigarette between her lips and began pawing through them, just as Squall was returning from the kitchen.

"Some eclectic taste you've got," she mumbled over the cigarette, gazing quizzically at some of the discs.

Squall said nothing and sat on the couch, placing her drink on the end table and sipping at his own. He took a hard drag from his cigarette, then smashed it out in the ashtray, turning to look at her. He watched as her facial expressions changed with every jewel case she passed through, from disinterest, to approval, and sometimes to sheer confusion. He found it entertaining, to say the least, as she critiqued his musical library, sitting with her legs stretched out, pile of CDs between them, in almost a child-like manner. Noticing that her cigarette was nothing more than ash at this point, he rose and brought the ashtray over to her.

"Thanks," she said, placing the remains of it into the black ceramic tray. Glancing between a few of the discs, she let out a sigh and opened one of them. She twisted around to turn on the stereo and placed the CD inside, roughly nudging the tray shut.

She turned back to her original position to find Squall now sitting on the floor before her, his steely gaze intent on her face. She offered a quirk of a smile and leaned back on her hands as Led Zeppelin began to waft through the air at a low volume.

She looked so seductive at that very moment to Squall. He was having a hard enough time maintaining composure, and the look she was giving him was just making it more difficult. He found himself starting to lean in, just a little closer, so slowly that she barely would notice.

She did notice though, and her lips parted, much the way they had when he'd nearly kissed her at the bar. A thoughtful look crossed her face, though, and she cleared her throat and stood, scurrying over to her neglected drink on the end table. Without a hesitation, she picked it up and threw the contents back, giving a shudder as she slammed the empty glass back onto the table.

There was a long pause and he thought he saw her body waver just a little.

"You okay?" he asked, rising to his feet in the event that he would need to catch her if she collapsed.

"Yeah..." she breathed. "I... I think I need to lie down."

She wavered again, and Squall scooped her up and carried her down the hall, heading straight for his bedroom. He gently placed her on the mattress in the dark room, then turned hit the switch on the wall. Red light filled the room from the ceiling, giving the place an eerie, but undeniably sensual glow.

Rinoa raised an eyebrow.

"I, uh... I don't care for very bright light," Squall explained. "Are you... are you okay?"

Rinoa didn't answer immediately. Instead, she stared up at the ceiling, letting the day's thoughts stream through her mind once more. She wasn't that drunk. Tipsy, yes, but she was fully aware of what being in his bedroom might lead to. Now she just had to decide if this was, in fact, where she wanted it to go.

The silence allowed for the soft music to seep its way into the room, and Squall sat gently on the edge of the bed, careful not to get too close, but finding it difficult as the bed was nothing more than a double. The side of her calf brushed against his lower back as his weight on the mattress shifted her.

Without much thought, Squall's hand reached back and gently swept his fingertips up and down her leg, his manner nothing more than affectionate.

He quickly realized what he was doing, but found, to no surprise, that he liked doing it, so he made no attempt to stop. "Rinoa?"

Her dark gaze drifted down to his, and she realized that he was still awaiting an answer.

"Yes," she whispered. She wasn't entirely sure that she was answering his concerned question, or if she was answering the question that had thickened the tension around them, but remained unspoken.

She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and sat up next to him, suddenly sorry for the loss of the sensation of his hand on her leg. His touch felt good, and damned if she didn't want more.

"I don't know what I want..." she mumbled aloud. "I can't get my thoughts together."

Squall stared at her downcast face for a long moment, then spoke in a hoarse voice. "I think... that we think too much. We really should stop that."

Rinoa looked up at him and flashed a brilliant smile. "You might be right."

She reached down, her eyes never leaving his, and grazed his hand with her own. _Not in spite of Jax... but for me. For once._

Squall felt every last ounce of his will crumble at the touch her delicate fingers on his hand. He was in this... further than he'd let himself acknowledge before.

Before he really knew what was happening, his lips were on hers, rough and uncontrolled. He wasn't sure what he expected from her, probably to be pushed away or an unbridled return of passion, but neither came. He received hesitance, but only at first. Within seconds, she began to respond to him, deepening the kiss, a low moan escaping from her throat.

The sound found its way to his ears, only to push him further into madness. His hands crept up to her face, holding her there, relishing the feeling of her soft lips and her tongue as it boldly explored his mouth. He was sinking further into oblivious passion, and he found himself lowering her to the bed, never parting from her.

He might have claimed then that he didn't know what he was doing, that the alcohol was having an effect on him, but he knew it wasn't true. He knew what he was doing, knew it wasn't the wisest decision, but it was the decision he had made. It was going to happen, and he wasn't going to prevent it.

Rinoa's fingers wound through his silky hair, the taste of liquor and cigarettes on his lips intoxicating her, and she loved it. His lips finally broke from hers and began a trail down her neck of kisses, licks, and soft bites, and she realized that she was once again lying on his bed. She looked up at the ceiling, woozy from the red light and feeling of his mouth on her neck and collarbone.

"Oh, God..." she breathed absently.

Squall smiled at the soft words, his mouth moving back up her neck to her mouth, once again seizing it, his hands drifting down to the hem of her top, slowly lifting the fabric.

Without hesitation, Rinoa raised her upper body from the bed, allowing him to pull her shirt off, then settled back into the mattress as he kissed her again, her hands immediately going for the hem of his own shirt. Her hands skimmed up his back, bringing the shirt up, and pulled it over his head as they momentarily broke the kiss, only to resume the action.

He propped himself above her with an elbow as he continued kissing her, his other hand snaking around to her back and swiftly unhooking the clasp of her bra. Slowly, he peeled it off of her and broke away from her lips for a moment to look at her.

"God, you're beautiful," he breathed as he kissed her again.

She smirked against his lips, her hands searching for his belt buckle. She fumbled with it for a moment then defeated it and pulled it off, her hands returning to unbutton his pants. Before she could complete the task, however, Squall once again broke away, grasped her hands in his, pinning her to the bed, and began another heated trail down her neck, this time venturing lower.

She gasped as his mouth explored her bare chest, kissing and gently gnawing at her supple breasts. He released her hands and found his way to the button and zipper of her jeans, pulling the tab down and sliding the dense fabric down her legs. She moaned in delirious pleasure and anticipation, her hands caressing the muscles of his back and arms, through the silky tufts of his hair as he removed every last stitch of clothing from her body.

His mouth returned to hers, one arm supporting his weight as the other explored her body from her bent knees that were now on either side of him and up to her shoulders, taking his time along the way.

She once again tackled the button of his pants, and at some point succeeded in undressing him, though she wasn't sure how long it had taken, her mind occupied with other things, with taking in the feeling of his body against hers, his tongue in her mouth, and the anticipation of what was about to happen.

Normally, she would have insisted on extended foreplay, but in this case knew she didn't need it, or even really want it. She was ready, and her body ached for him.

Squall broke the kiss again and looked at her once more.

Then it happened. The chance to rethink all of it was gone in a swift motion. He was deep inside her, his eyes fixed on hers, drinking in the pleasure that was all over her face, and the sounds that came from her as a result.

The moment overtook them both and they moved together with mutual urgency, unaware and unconcerned of the loud grunts and groans they both made as they sank further and further into oblivion.

Within minutes, their movements became quick, almost brutal, as they got closer and closer to the edge.

"Oh, God..." Rinoa gasped, her orgasm rushing through her whole body, causing her to shudder beneath him.

Squall buried his face in her neck, breathing in the scent of her hair, and felt her pulsating around him, pushing him over the edge moments after, a groan tearing from deep within his chest.

They slowed to a stop, just breathing, their bodies rising and falling against each other with every breath. After several moments, Squall finally mustered the energy to roll off of her and lie next to her, taking her in his arms.

_That was unusual_.

Squall nearly laughed aloud at the thought, realizing that he hadn't been referring to what it initially sounded like. He hadn't meant the sex, though it had happened in a different way than he was used to, but he had meant the act of wrapping his arms around her afterwards. He had a tendency to withdraw, which he knew wasn't a good thing, but it was a fact either way, he would usually just roll away and fall asleep in an unaffectionate and sometimes cold manner.

But not this time. This time... it just seemed appropriate.

* * *

A/N: SMUT! Hahahahaha! Holy CRAP, I was nervous about posting this. But... you guys can handle it, yes? Anyway, this is not the end of the story (duh), but... I do hope this appeases all of you out there who were begging for some smut and/or some Squinoa-ness.

Thank you so much for all of the reviews! I'm so sorry it's taken me so damn long to get this up. As I've mentioned a million times, this is... a very personal story for me, so I really have to be in the right frame of mind to write it and do it justice. I fear I may have jumped into the smut a little prematurely, but... what can I say? I'd written the lemon here months ago, and it was just eating me up that I didn't have a place to post it yet.

Wow... did anyone else notice that this whole author's note is full of terrible puns? Hehe. Love you guys! Keep reading!


	9. The Downward Spiral

A/N: Holy crap, I'm back! It took long enough, eh? Anyway, um... smut warning.

9. The Downward Spiral

Quistis Trepe-Almasy needed a drink. Badly.

She knew she was making a mistake. Her marriage was already suffering as it was, and these late nights in the office weren't exactly making things any better.

It wasn't that she didn't love Seifer, in fact, that was quite the opposite. Once she got something in her head, though, it wasn't going to leave until she'd broken it down to its very core or it simply lost its luster.

She trudged her laptop along and she skirted through the poorly lit parking lot, though she knew she wouldn't need it. Force of habit at this point.

She had problems. She knew it, but she couldn't make herself say it. That meant opening floodgates that she didn't think she had the capacity to handle. It meant no more late nights of work, and late afternoons in a therapist's office instead. The nights at the office were much more comforting.

She was kidding herself. Anyone who looked at her saw a strong, smart, iron-willed woman. Wouldn't they be shocked to know that she had weaknesses that nearly buckled her knees on a daily basis? She had poor defense mechanisms like most, vices and addictions if one wanted to be cruel about it.

Releasing a sigh, she adjusted her glasses with her free hand as she shuffled through the mostly empty parking lot, and unlocked the door to the building she'd been given weeks before when she started this account. The account that was consuming her life.

The elevator ride was too slow, the blonde pursing her lips as she tried to will it along faster, eager for distraction from these thoughts that plagued her. Away from thoughts of her husband.

The doors finally opened and she stepped onto the dark floor, only moonlight from the windows illuminating the long rows of cubicles, eyes immediately focusing on a familiar head of dark hair.

* * *

Ice blue orbs flashed open at feeling heat upon his body, momentarily assuming it was the sun that peeked in through the blinds, warming the skin of his bare chest. Until he felt it to the side of him, too. 

Squall knew what he'd done before he even turned his head. _Oh, fuck._

He bit his lip, afraid to turn and see that she was really there, confirming the deed that he'd wanted to do since he'd met her, and the very last thing he should have done.

Slyly, his eyes slid to the side. There she was, rumpled and beautiful, leaving no doubt of what she'd spent her night doing. Her lips were lightly swollen; abused from his kisses. Her dark hair was mussed and sprawled over his pillow, the side of her breast peeking out from the thin sheet that barely concealed her curves. His gaze lowered. The smooth flesh of her hip was exposed, too.

_Oh, fuck_, he repeated internally, putting a hand to his forehead. Now he had to figure out what he was going to do.

Had she been anyone else, he knew that he would have just made some lame excuse to leave, hoping she'd have vacated the apartment by the time he got back. She'd see right through it, though, and it startled him that he cared so much about her feelings.

There'd never been a doubt that he liked her. That much had been obvious from the beginning. She was just as he was, though, and surely would be able to identify with his dilemma. Feelings caused trouble, and they both knew it.

It was even worse that he'd made love to his friend's girlfriend, even in spite of the fact that Jax had obviously been a jerk to her. That thought made him tilt his head and lower his hand, eyes transfixed on the ceiling. What _had_ Jax done to her? What was he doing in those long nights at the office, or would it be wiser to ask _who_ was he doing?

He turned to focus on her again, absorbing the way she looked in his bedroom, under his sheets, the streaks of early sunlight making her dark hair gleam.

…and he just couldn't make himself conjure regret no matter how hard he tried.

What was making him panic was the fact that he knew he wanted this to happen again, he wanted to wake up to her looking like this, in beautiful disarray from a long night of lovemaking, and he wanted to do it without having to worry about anyone finding out.

She'd stated clearly once, though, that she had her own reasons for staying with Jax, and Squall doubted that she'd be quick to give it up now. Was he okay with that?

Clenching his teeth at not being able to answer his own question, he swung his legs out from under the sheet and over the side of his bed. He stood quietly, swiftly pulling on a pair of loose cotton pants and grabbing a grey t-shirt on the way out the bedroom door.

He was getting a slight headache, and he wasn't sure if it was the alcohol from the night before, or it was from thinking too hard. Either way, he needed coffee, and once he'd adorned his shirt, he began to make it, unaware that Rinoa had awoken the moment he left the bed.

Squall nearly jumped a mile when he felt her light fingertips graze his back, and he spun around to observe the brunette sliding up onto the counter, wearing one of his t-shirts, her expression blank, but her chocolate eyes intently on his. She wasn't wearing her glasses and her hair was still in slight disorder.

_Oh, fuck_. Did she have to look so sexy in his clothes?

"Did I wake you?" he managed to say, finding his mouth was struggling to work properly.

The gentle motion of her throat was the only response he got for several moments.

"Whatever you do," she finally began, carefully, "don't apologize to me. Alright?"

He almost visibly gave a start at her words, but his brow merely furrowed, and he licked his lips. "I wouldn't."

Rinoa scrutinized him, reading his expression the best she was able. A smile found her lips as she did, and her hand reached out to cup the side of his face. He really wasn't sorry.

"I'm not going to, either," she said plainly, her eyes boring into his. "I knew what I was doing, and I wanted it."

A soft chuckle rumbled from deep in Squall's throat and he stepped closer to her, his hips between her knees as she sat upon the counter. "I could tell."

His mouth curled into a cocky smirk, his hand finding its way up her silky arm and behind her neck where he pulled her into him, lips meeting her smiling pout.

The flavors of both of them came rushing back in a flurry of heated memories from the night before and the kiss instantly intensified. Rinoa whimpered against his lips, Squall's fingertips trailing down her spine through the t-shirt she wore and pressing his palm to the small of her back, pulling her closer to him.

God, he knew he shouldn't be doing this for so many reasons, but logic was refusing to step in and correct him, and this woman, whose heat was radiating against him from where he stood between her parted thighs, wasn't putting up any sort of argument, her fingers sprawling through his hair in encouragement.

Logic be damned, then, if it chose to have no part in this.

His hand left her back to slither around to her hip and inch over her abdomen, feeling the soft flesh as he found his way under the hem of the shirt. His lips broke from hers then, seeing as she sucked in a breath, her skin flushed and her eyelids lowering slightly.

He licked his lips again, this time in pure pleasure as he watched her expression. He wanted nothing more than to hear those sounds from her luscious lips again, the sounds he'd caused her to make the night before, the almost inaudible whispers of his name she'd given as her muscles tightened.

The only thing obstructing his fingers, he found, was the flimsy fabric of her panties, and it did nothing to prevent his long digits from slipping inside the edge, feeling her moist heat immediately, a groan emerging from him, the sound mingled with her own gasp and subsequent moan.

His forefinger found the tiny bead of nerves in seconds and he stroked it tenderly, his eyes fixed on her face as she opened her mouth and drew in a shaking breath. A tiny smile played on his lips as he did it again, the low moan she offered making his own body temperature increase.

He found a rhythm in seconds, every expression on her face telling him what she liked and how she liked it, her hips tilting up from the counter against his hand in eagerness.

Rinoa was becoming delirious, her hands falling back to support her weight on the counter as she leaned back. His fingers were skilled, a long moan pouring from her as he switched his index finger for his thumb, the subtle increase in pressure making heat wash through her in waves.

Squall leaned forward to capture her bottom lip between his own lips, releasing it with tediousness, his eyes focused on her the entire time. Only then did he let a finger dip lower as his thumb continued to stroke her, and the slender finger slid into her. He almost grinned at the way her voice became louder and her brows knitted together. He bit his lip, remembering this velvet tightness from the night before wrapped around him as he pulled back his finger, only to slide it in again, over and over again in time with the strokes of his thumb.

"Oh… God…" she panted, her hips bucking as his fingers worked at her with precision and care. Her whole body was stiffening, and she was already close. It only made her more excited knowing that he was watching her intently, his gaze enthralled as he brought her to the edge. She whimpered his name.

"That's right," he muttered, his lips close to hers as he let his eyes trace over her entire face, his fingers never once faltering in their ministrations. "Come for me."

Her fingernails clawed into the table as she obeyed his whim, not that she had much choice in the matter. Her walls clamped hard around the invading finger and a primal groan tore from her, not really seeing the smile that danced over Squall's handsome face as he felt her contract and pulsate around his slowing fingers.

"God damn," he mumbled at the force of her climax, his motions coming to a stop before he slid his finger out of her.

She barely heard his soft curse of admiration, her mind wrapped in oblivion as she slowly came down from her high, her heart thundering rapidly in her chest. She'd come out here expecting… well, she didn't know exactly what she was expecting, but it didn't really occur to her that they'd end up getting naughty on his kitchen counter.

Not that she'd complain. She'd awoken to him leaving his bed and instantly worried that he'd accuse her, or himself, of making a terrible mistake.

This served as a nice tension reliever and she caught herself smiling. She was fairly confident at this point that he wasn't going to throw out what they'd shared because of his friendship with Jax.

_Jax._

"Fuck!" she swore, sliding off of the counter and darting around Squall to run to the bedroom.

Squall blinked at the sudden outburst, shaking his head to try and gather his wits once more. _Crazy woman_. "Uh… Rin?"

He followed after her, finding the slight brunette scurrying in a desperate tumble to get her clothes on her body and she flashed a sheepish grin.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" she started, buttoning her jeans, "I just, ah… wanted to be back before…"

Did she even want to say his name? She suddenly felt as if even uttering it was going to shatter this spell they'd formed around themselves, and Squall would snap back to reality. The last thing she wanted to see was regret on his face directed toward her.

He merely chuckled and gave a slight nod of his head. It wasn't regret, but there was certainly some hesitation in there, but from what exactly, she wasn't sure. She pursed her lips and adjusted her clothes onto her form, skirting past him to head to the bathroom for some last minute grooming, only to be stopped by his fingers around her wrist.

She looked at his face, seeing nothing but sincerity.

"Hey," he said softly, "I'm not sorry, Rin."

Rinoa smiled, the expression mingled with relief, and the sound of the nickname for her. He'd said it before, but the way it danced on his lips sounded more like an endearment than her own name. She replied with leaning up to press her lips against his, pulling back only to mumble against his pale pout. "Neither am I."

It had definitely surprised her, she realized. She would have thought this would have felt a lot worse, as it usually did when something like this happened. She truly wasn't sorry, though, but she was still to leery to dwell on why it had felt so right.

Squall smiled against her lips, giving her hip a light rub and a subsequent pat. "Go on, babe."

She grinned, and continued her trek to the bathroom, giving her locks a quick comb through before heading back out to the door and grabbing her belongings. She had half a mind to stop and ask when she'd see him again as he watched her leave, leaning against the wall in the hallway, but she knew by the delicate smile on his face that she didn't need to.

She left the apartment without a word, her mind racing as she tried to think of excuses for her absense if Jax was back at the hotel, and she only had one street crossing to do it.

Stepping into the early sunlight, she drew in a breath and began her journey.

* * *

A/N: I'm so sorry, guys! I hope you're still with me. I apologize if this seems a little... out of character, even for my obviously OOC characters. Did that make any sense? It's been a long time and I need to get back into the groove of things. This story ain't over yet! Hope the smut wasn't too rough for ya. You know you secretly loved it! 


	10. Duplicity and Diamonds

A/N: You guys probably want to kill me. I understand. You'll want to kill me even more so when I request that you read over the last two chapters or so, just so you can remember the events that occurred within the story's last day or so. Otherwise, you might not follow what's up. Thanks for bearing with me for so long. For the record, I can't believe I've been writing this thing for four friggin' years, and I'm just barely getting the tenth chapter up.

10. Duplicity and Diamonds

"What happened last night?"

The words froze her in mid-step, eyes darting quickly to the source.

There was latent anger beneath the expression, but his brow was creased in undeniable concern. She didn't want to consider whether or not he'd intended to conceal the worry that had etched across his expression.

Quistis sighed. "Seifer, I just got caught up in work again. I'm sorry. I found... usual things when I went into the office. I didn't notice what time it was until after I got home, and you were asleep." Her shoulders slumped with every sentence, defeated with the inevitable storm that would come.

At least she hadn't exactly been lying. Digging the pointed toe of her sensible pump into the thick white carpet, she let her eyes drop to watch the fibers part, her intention to make coffee utterly forgotten.

The storm didn't come, however.

"This has to stop, Quistis."

At the sound of Seifer's soft murmur, Quistis blinked and looked up. His emerald eyes were downcast, his jaw tense, and a heartbreaking earnestness pulling the corners of his lips into a grim line. He sat sullenly in her office chair, and by the look of it, he'd been sitting there silently since the early hours of morning. She hadn't heard a noise in the house since she'd awoken to find a void in his side of the bed, and had simply assumed he'd left to run his usual array of errands before the club opened.

Here he was, though. Listless and solemn, his unhappiness palpable. The room was thick with a unspoken words and internalized emotions, and Quistis felt like dirt.

"Just... give me a little more time," she whispered weakly, half-terrified that he'd hear the request, and the other half wanting to draw this all to peaceful, if tense, conclusion. "There are things happening, and..."

Seifer raised his gaze to her as she trailed off, the darkness around his eyes painfully visible. He wore thought on his expression, his head tilted in consideration.

"I can only give you so much before my line is reached, Quis," he sighed, slowly standing from the chair as though his legs would snap if he moved too quickly. "Love is never unconditional, babe. Everyone has a line that can be crossed. If not, they have no boundaries, no self-respect."

Quistis stood quietly, absorbing his words as they broke through the defenses that she knew couldn't stand up to the truth he was displaying for her. She simply watched as he stepped closer to her, and lowered her eyes as his fingertips gently brushed her cheek with a remorseful touch.

"I have boundaries," he told her quietly, sadly. "And if you don't, Quistis, there's only so far we can go. If you want my help, you know I'd give it if you'd just ask."

With that, his fingers fell away and the shield of his body exposed her to the garish rays of the morning, leaving her to the impact of his poignant words, and all the truth she didn't want to see.

* * *

"Surprise, surprise," Rinoa muttered to find the hotel room just the way it had been left the day before, a surprising sting of disappointment flaring up as she closed the door behind her. The very notion gave her pause, and a tightness in her chest.

Had she wanted Jax to be here, awake, and interrogating her about where she'd been? And for the sake of concern about the thread of a relationship they still had, or an excuse to tell him exactly what she'd been doing all night?

She chuckled humorlessly at the idea that she needed coercion of that kind to be forthcoming. It left a bitter taste in her mouth, and she padded to the bathroom, feeling the need to wash it away, along with any evidence of her deception.

_I'm not sorry, Rin._

Kicking off her shoes, she treaded over the cold tiles of the bathroom, and caught her reflection in the mirror. The ghost of a smile still played on her lips at the words that whispered over and over again through her mind, broadened by the sight reflected back at her.

She was far too emotionally invested to objectively determine whether or not she looked as though she'd spent the night – and fair portion of the morning – in the throes of such delectable sin, but it was plain to her. Her hair was still in several fine tangles, and she could smell the scents of stale smoke and sex, hints of Squall's own musky fragrance embedded in her skin.

Biting her still tender lip, she turned to start the shower, not wasting a moment to step in, even as the water was still cold. Gradually, the tangles and damning reminders of the night before were nothing more than secret memoirs, down the drain and never to be shared.

The brunette closed her eyes as to mourn the loss, committing every detail she could to memory. She opened her mouth and breathed in deeply, tastes of tap water and crossed forbiddance on her lips. She smiled, not hearing the door to the hotel as Jax entered, and the springs of the bed as he sat down and waited anxiously for her shower to end.

* * *

"You're chipper today."

Squall looked up from his task, properly aligning the bottles behind the bar in order of height, and sent Selphie a half-smile. "This from the city's most pathologically chipper individual? I'm just working."

The petite girl put a hand on her hip, and a knowing smirk on her face. "Working? If that's what you call organizing the alcohol alphabetically, then deciding it 'disrupts the aesthetics' of the bar, and then putting them in varying rows from shortest to tallest, and tallest to shortest."

Squall abruptly stopped what he was doing, then dropped his hands and pivoted on a heel. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the back counter and grinned sheepishly. "Well... I just figured I'd help you with prep today. Irvine's dropping in later, right?"

At the mention of her boyfriend's name, Selphie's large eyes brightened. "Yep! But if he finds you going all Feng Shui on his liquor, he's gonna think you're going a little light in the loafers, you know what I mean?" She sent a rather theatrical wink towards him, and a grave nod. "He won't care, but it could affect the kinda clientèle we bring in here, and Irvy _hates_ The Village People."

"Selph, I'm not gay," Squall laughed, knowing she was just teasing him, "Trust me."

"Well," she defended, throwing her arms up dramatically, "just sayin'. It's been a long time since the last time I saw you with a girl, and frankly, darlin', those last few were a li-ttle below your caliber." With a waggle of her finger towards him, she shook her head. "'_Trust me_'," she mocked, playfully. "How the hell do I know you're not..."

Suspicion crept over her brow, the humor falling comically from her face as she cut her sentence in two clean, largely spaced halves.

"...Unless you got laid."

Quickly, Squall spun around again, hiding the grin he knew he couldn't easily keep disguised.

Selphie was in shock. She was just busting his chops, knowing that Squall had the company of women on and off for periods of time, but never had he outwardly displayed any sort of effect from such an encounter.

"Jeez, Squally, I've never seen you glow like a pregnant woman before. I think congrats might be in order. Who's the other lucky party in this mutation experiment?"

Sighing, Squall shook his head, opening his mouth to send a quip right back in her direction when he was cut off by the sweet, silken timbre of another voice.

"You're pregnant, Squall?"

He spun back around, blinking in surprise. "Rin!"

"When were you gonna tell me?" she asked, a half-hearted smirk on her lips.

Selphie instantly raised an eyebrow, quickly picking up on the sudden tension in the room, as though Squally and Rinoa had completely forgotten they were in public. With a grin, she silently excused herself, pointless as the effort was, and got to cleaning the tables in the front.

Only after several seconds of gazing intensely at one another did it finally occur to Squall that her voice had been thinner than normal, and her expression wore a trace of uncertainty.

Swallowing, he tried to reject the idea that she was starting to have regrets. In spite of himself, however, he found his mouth opening. "What's the matter?"

Her dark eyes slid to the side briefly, peering through the edges of her glasses to make sure there was no one else within earshot. Fortunately, the bar had just opened, and its usual patrons wouldn't be arriving for another few hours once the standard workday ended. Only Selphie was close, and Rinoa was too distraught to be terribly concerned with her presence.

Still, she spoke quietly, her gaze on the bar before her. "Jax..."

Leaning over the bar, Squall rested his arms on the wood, piercing blue eyes immediately looking over her for any sign of physical altercation. _He hadn't found out and gotten violent, had he?_ He couldn't see anything on her face, but the sleeves of her black sweater were long, and her legs were hidden from his sight under the bar. When he finally spoke, his voice was tighter than he would have liked. "What? What happened with Jax?"

"I... I went back to the hotel, and he wasn't there. I took a shower, and when I got out, he was sitting on the bed, waiting for me. He gave me roses, and started babbling to me about how sorry he was and how much he wanted to make everything right, and...." She paused for a moment to shake her head. "I don't think he even realized I hadn't stayed there last night. He was acting so strange. I can't understand how...."

Brows furrowed, Squall stared at her, as lost as she seemed to be about where this was going. Glancing away for a moment, he drew in a deliberate breath in a meager attempt to will away the unwelcome anxiety creeping over him. He wasn't entirely sure he wanted to hear the rest of the story. _Fear of Jax finding out?_ He thought, _Or fear of Rinoa recommitting herself to the undeserving prick?_

"So he's trying to make up with you...?" he finally mustered, still uncertain about what had shaken her so profoundly. He found his jaw tensing at the idea of their make-up session, but it wasn't exactly unexpected. She was still in a relationship with the guy, after all.

When she didn't answer immediately, he tried again, his voice softening with his increasing concern. "Rin? What happened, babe?"

With all the speed of a clock's hour hand, Rinoa lifted her left arm from where her hands had been clasped beneath the bar, and sprawled her fingers out atop the surface.

Squall's breath caught in his throat, nearly choking in surprise.

A diamond, large and awkward on such a pale and delicate finger, glared smugly up at him.

"He... gave me a ring," she whispered, her voice failing her completely as though she'd just realized it herself.


	11. Passive Resistance

A/N: For reference... read the last chapter again!

11. Passive Resistance

"He... gave me a ring," she whispered, her voice failing her completely as though she'd just realized it herself.

"I see that," Squall croaked weakly, unsure if he was still breathing properly.

This must have been what panic felt like. Squall was in unfamiliar territory, unsure when, if ever, he'd experienced an assortment of emotions quite like this.

"He... he asked you to marry him?" he continued. It was patently evident that his subconsciousness had decided that Squall hadn't endured quite enough discomfort, if the unnecessary inquiry was any indication.

Rinoa blinked rapidly, unable to peel her eyes from the gaudy adornment on her hand. "More like he _told_ me. I mean... one minute he was practically groveling at my feet for forgiveness, and the next... he's shoving this..." she paused, fumbling for a word to capture the appropriate emphasis she felt, "...this... this mammoth _monstrosity_ on my finger, kissing my cheek, telling me we're getting married, and then flying out the door again. I didn't even hear where he was going..."

"So... you didn't say yes?" He almost winced at the question that tumbled from his traitorous mouth. Stupid, needless queries seemed all he was capable of for the time being.

Clearly, her flat look implied that she concurred. "I didn't say _anything_. I just... stared at it after he split for Christ knows how long, and then walked over here." Her eyes drifted back toward her hand. "I can't even figure out how he paid for this, let alone why he felt compelled to propose to me after what happened yesterday."

Squall just nodded stiffly, unsure if it was wise to open his mouth at this point. She hadn't said yes, particularly, but the fact that she was wearing the ring, and that Jax had stunned the both of them with this spectacle was leaving a foul taste in his mouth. His head was spinning, endorphins and lingering flashes of the night before racing through his mind, only to be darkened by the knot that was forming itself in his gut at the bizarre turn of events.

Rinoa took notice, finally tearing herself back into focus. "Squall?"

"Squall, hon, you don't look so good," Selphie chimed in as she returned to the bar. "You alright? You need to go sit in the cooler for a while?"

His jaw tensed to the point he realized he was grinding his teeth, Squall forced the muscles to loosen and merely nodded in a brief, erratic motion. "Yeah."

Rinoa promptly slid off the stool, her lungs tightening with sudden anxiety, and made to follow him as he walked determinately to the metal door just off to the side of the bottle racks that lined the back of the bar. Sliding in just behind him, a nick before the door closed, she offhandedly noticed the room was merely a chilled closet. There was enough room to maneuver, but just barely, crates of perishable items, champagne and blush wines all stacked along the walls.

Squall sat upon a few empty, overturned milk crates, looking hard at the concrete floor.

Drawing in a shaking breath, she slinked down into a squat so that she might meet his eyes for the impending conversation.

But what conversation? The fact was, neither of them could find an appropriate thing to say. Or anything even resembling appropriate. The situation was fucked up, and there were no two ways about that. Anything that came from either of them at this point was doomed to be unpleasant; hopeless, or laced with accusation, guilt, or something equally abrasive.

"I can't find a reason to regret it."

The words that fell from Squall's lips were unexpected, to say the least, and the way his brow was furrowed in confusion made it clear that he hadn't expected his own response, either.

Looking up from the floor, he brought his ice blue eyes to greet her intent gaze, dark with unformed questions, and heaved a frustrated sigh, steam wafting forth to be helplessly flanked by frigid air.

"I know you're in a relationship, and what we did last night was purely fuck-all_ cheating_ in its most..." he began, pausing with a gesture of his hand as if grasping for the right word, "...visceral form, and I should feel bad. We both should."

She could only nod her agreement, the movement slow as molasses. "We should."

"But I don't." He licked his lips, and waited a short pause for her to say something, before deciding he didn't want to let her yet. It wasn't fair, but he wasn't sure he was ready to hear her admit her remorse before she'd heard his testimony. "We're both guilty here, but... why do I feel like I didn't do anything wrong?" He slid his fingers hastily through his hair, a telltale tick of nervousness. He felt like his insides were in a vise. "The only thing I regret is that... that pitiful fuck has done nothing but fuck me over time and again for as long as I've known him, and I've just let him do it over and over-"

"Wait, wait," she interrupted, putting her hands up in front of her, the cold air in the freezer causing them to shake. "It almost sounds like you're telling me that this is some kind of vindication for you. Was this..." she paused to swallow, "was this out of revenge on Jax?"

The tone of her voice caused a sharp stab to strike right through the center of his chest. There was an undertone of anger, certainly, but more heartbreaking was the empathy in the question. In spite of the position this put her in if her question was true, this girl was trying to put herself in his shoes and ask instead of tossing out accusations and conclusions. What beauty she possessed, what soul, regardless of her missteps.

"No," he breathed weakly, reverently. He cleared his throat and spoke a decibel louder. "Rin, _no_. It's not that at all. I didn't finish was I was saying."

Letting her hands fall, she bowed her head slightly in penitence. "I'm sorry. Please..."

"He's a bastard, Rinoa, and you know that," he immediately continued. "Yeah, it's true that he's taken and taken from me, and I've just given and fuckin' given, all without complaint. You're not mine, and I know that, but... I feel like..." His voice drifted as he tried to formulate a coherent way to phrase the racing thoughts that had cluttered his mind since she'd walked in that first day with Jax. "I feel like he doesn't deserve what he has, and I'm not sure I can keep from complaining this time." His eyes bore into hers with gravity, his meaning unquestionable.

Lips parting, the steam from her breath was in errant pattern, shaking. Her eyes lifted to stare at the stack of crates behind him. "I can't just tell him outright. But I don't know if I can lie to him, either."

Her voice was colored with defeat, and the sound was terrifying to both of them.

"You can't marry him," Squall replied, reflecting her tone.

It wasn't easy to discern if it was a demand or a plea, and her eyes dropped back down to meet his. Only he'd let his own gaze fall back to the floor beneath her feet. She intended to ask him to clarify that statement, but was interrupted by the door opening, followed by Selphie peeking inside.

"Sorry to interrupt, but Irvy just walked in. Better come out before he sees the both of you in here and, er... makes any assumptions. Last time he thought someone did it in the cooler, I got stuck with disinfecting the whole damn place. Quick, while he's in the office."

Cursing under her breath, Rinoa gave a lingering look toward Squall and stood to her full height. Shuffling toward the door as Selphie disappeared from view, she wrapped her cold hand around the frozen steel handle on the door, and spoke again, her eyes ahead. "I don't feel bad, either, for whatever that's worth."

With that, she left the bar, the lack of resolution reverberating throughout the newly formed hollowness that had taken up residence inside the both of them.

* * *

"It's her own fault."

It was so hard to take Irvine seriously in that hat. God damn.

"I know that."

"So why are you here?"

"Can't a guy get a beer at his friend's bar?"

"But you have your own bar, and it's full of beer you've already paid for."

Damn his logical... _scheming_.

"Irvine," Seifer grunted, his eyes staring flatly at the wannabe cowboy's cocky expression. "I don't want to be there tonight. Nida's running the place. Just... be a goddamn bartender tonight, huh?"

The smirk melting from his lips, Irvine took a moment to consider his friend's obvious distress. "Do you think she's fuckin' around?"

"Jesus, Irvine," the blond groaned, letting his open hand smack loudly against the bar. "You have a real way with tact."

Irvine shrugged, lifting his hand in a show of innocence as the other pushed a beer toward his friend. "Tact gets you nowhere, man. Bluntness and honesty keep the world turning. I'm nothin' if not genuine."

"Then explain that hat," Seifer returned into the mouth of the beer bottle, lifting an eyebrow. The brew was cold, the first pleasant sensation he'd experienced all day as he swallowed down a hefty pull.

Irvine narrowed his eyes. "There's nothing wrong with my hat. Quit tryin' to dodge the subject. Is your wife screwing someone else?"

Sighing, the blond set down the bottle and spared a glance toward an approaching figure beside Irvine, noticing Squall for the first time that evening. The way his blue eyes darted back and forth between the two of them told Seifer that he'd probably heard Irvine's forthright inquiry. The discomfort on his face was unmistakable.

"I was... coming to say hello," Squall began, his eyes dropping and suddenly anywhere but on Seifer. "But I'm getting the impression it's a bad time for idle chat."

"Quistis," Irvine volunteered. Hey, they were all friends, right? "Working late. Late late, if you know what I mean. I think she's up to somethin'. Or someone."

"Thanks, Irvine," Seifer muttered, wrapping a hand around his beer bottle and rolling his eyes. "Your discretion is staggering."

"What discretion?" the cowboy replied, blinking. "I don't believe in that shit, either."

Squall's expression became visibly more tense, if Seifer could read anything from it, and he took a moment to guzzle down the rest of the bottle before finally drawing in a breath to speak again. "I don't know if it's that. She's always been this way. At some time or another. She gets fixated, and it's to the point where I start feeling like she's avoiding something. Avoiding me. Avoiding life." Pursing his lips and looking away for a moment to fight off a swell of unwelcome emotion, he continued again, slowly. "I suppose it's not unlikely she'd be unfaithful. If it's escapism she wants, why not that way, too?"

Raising his eyes back to Squall, Seifer saw turmoil there, and he couldn't discern if it was empathy or... guilt.

"Have you asked her?" Irvine piped up as he glanced over a ticket with a drink order, oblivious to the sudden tension between the two other men. "I mean, sure, she might lie, but at least you're still being honest about your thoughts. Besides, you know her better than anyone else. Maybe you'll know if she's lying."

"Sorry to hear all of this, man," Squall said suddenly, before Seifer had a chance to respond. "Let me know if I can do anything. I gotta go take care of an order right now, though."

Now that was certainly odd. It wasn't uncommon for Squall to be a little distant at times, even antisocial to a degree, but he'd always been one of the most reliable friends Seifer had ever known. Hell, he'd put up with Jax's shit more than anyone ever should have.

The blond didn't want to admit that he didn't like the direction his thoughts were leading him. He was too emotional, still reeling from his brief conversation with Quistis earlier too make an objective judgment about what the reality of the situation was likely to be. From here it looked like the issue of infidelity made Squall profoundly uncomfortable.

"No, but maybe I will," he finally answered, paying lip service for the moment more than anything, his focus on watching Squall as he hastily made his way to the other end of the bar and started assembling a collection of glasses for his next drink order. Clenching his jaw, he turned back to Irvine. "Thanks for the beer. I gotta get outta here. What do I owe you?"

Irvine paused from pouring green liqueur into a martini glass and skeptically assessed his friend for a moment. "On the house."

"Thanks," was all he muttered as he walked out, sparing one last glance at Squall before he went, in enough time to see Squall turn away before meeting his eyes.

* * *

A/N: Um... so yeah, it's been almost two years since I updated. Like I said... hell or highwater, I'm finishing this damn story even if it's going to take another five years to do it. Hopefully it won't. Not sure I have ANY readers left that have been with me since the beginning, but if you're out there... you're champs.


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